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43dayday's favorite FMLs
by Lilly / 10/02/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Arkansas) / Love
by hoolagirl4422 / 09/20/2013 at 7:23am / Hong Kong / Love
Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex". FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2013 at 2:30pm / United States (Tennessee) / Kids
Today, I went to a suicide prevention walk with a girl I like. Before the walk, we bought balloons to set free when they called the names of the deceased. To buy a balloon, you had to write a name on a sheet. Apparently, you weren't supposed to write your own. They called my name. FML
by Anonymous / 09/09/2013 at 7:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm / Switzerland (Bern) / Work
Today, I fell asleep on the beach while tanning. I was woken up by the flock of seagulls eating the bread from my stomach. Why was bread on my stomach? Because my little brother knows birds are my biggest fear. FML
by Nanana32 / 08/14/2013 at 4:28pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Animals
Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML
by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing / 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by kenbez123 / 08/14/2013 at 3:55am / Malta / Miscellaneous
by hairless by death / 08/13/2013 at 12:07pm / United States (California) / Love
by skaterboy / 08/13/2013 at 11:36am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML
by master baiter / 08/12/2013 at 1:11pm / United States (New York) / Work
by GiantsFan13 / 07/23/2013 at 10:49am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by 27161697 / 07/22/2013 at 12:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/27/2013 at 8:13am / United Kingdom / Transportation
by the_lonely_life / 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm / United States / Intimacy
- Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom,… Today, the most action I had on Valentine's day was a homeless guy pulling his dick out at me as I… Today, my boyfriend and I were about to take our first shower together. When he came into the room,…