Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

3051628

Offline (19 hours ago) | Search for a member

3051628

22Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 4 November 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 30014
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About 3051628 : Currently studying Meteorology at Penn State University, and I'm headed into the first semester of my Junior year. In general, I'm a relaxed, laid back guy. I love listening to music from nearly any genre and I also love to play video games. The newest two consoles I have are the Xbox One and Wii U. Another hobby of mine is going on long walks (while listening to music of course). I'll the past I've played basketball, soccer, tried some fencing, and a little football. I've been on this app almost every day since I first happened upon it roughly seven years ago.
I'm not sure what else to put. If there's anything else you'd like to know l, feel free to message me. Unfortunately, I'm not the best at answering messages quickly on here, so if I don't answer for a while it's nothing personal.

3051628's page activity

Visits<b>klutzyduck1</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 8:46pm<b>tnlander</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 2:25pm<b>Blackhawk706</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:37am<b>IronMan_Mk43</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:24am<b>1dvs_bstd</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 5:59am<b>beaglegal</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 9:15pm<b>je_suis_petit</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 1:42pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 10:23am<b>cristinewest</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 3:40am<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 11:17pm<b>JustATeenageMess</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 3:35am<b>strugglingatlife</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 10:29pm<b>marktimemark</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 11:44pm<b>dhuzz</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 7:21pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 11:49pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 7:00am<b>Attacksloth</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 6:18pm<b>mds9986</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 3:30am

Fucked!<b>tnlander</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:58pm<b>1dvs_bstd</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 11:59am<b>beaglegal</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 3:15am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:55am<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 3:17am<b>swanheart</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 11:23am<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:16am<b>ElMungia</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 11:10am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 3:56pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 9:27pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 3:01am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 6:18pm<b>je_suis_petit</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 5:51pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 7:00pm<b>Firegirl741</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:58am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:19am<b>HighasaCloud</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 12:38am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:58pm

3051628's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of 3051628's badges

3051628's favorite FMLs

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

#21455960
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30823) - you deserved it (1369)

On 08/14/2015 at 11:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, and he asked me to tell him what I wanted him to do. I said I wanted him to make me scream and cum. To which he replied, "Okay, be realistic now". FML

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, I pushed all the way in. She said, "Stop teasing me, put everything in." FML

#21454970
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33169) - you deserved it (3186)

On 08/11/2015 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, in the second week of August, hell has come to earth; my mom has been playing Christmas music all afternoon and is already searching online for decorations. I hope she buys a length of rope to go with them, because I've already given up on life. FML

#21453582
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22238) - you deserved it (2410)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by brbkillingmyself - United States

Today, I had to serve an incredibly rude and irrationally angry customer, but I managed to keep my cool. When he finally went to leave with his purchase, I wished him a good day. He whirled around and yelled "I'll have whatever the fuck kind of day I want, bitch!" FML

#21453572
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26187) - you deserved it (1774)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:23pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML

#21453366
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22023) - you deserved it (1906)

On 08/08/2015 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I found my daughter sobbing and trying to stick a wad of gauze to her vagina. She was having her first period. FML

#21453304
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23481) - you deserved it (9931)

On 08/07/2015 at 10:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to take a dump at work. The silence in the room was deafening, and I ended up singing to myself. After I proudly finished, there was a short silence, followed by a coworker in the next stall saying, "Um... don't quit the day job, Rick." I'll never live this down. FML

#21453118
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21116) - you deserved it (4961)

On 08/07/2015 at 11:16am - work - by not telling you my name (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, at work, the girl I've been into for the past 6 months confessed that she liked me, but also confessed she had sex with our boss. Our boss happens to be my dad. FML

#21452615
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26824) - you deserved it (1656)

On 08/06/2015 at 4:33am - work - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went over to talk to my boss. I must have snuck up on her because she was masturbating through her pants. She stopped and I had to chat away, pretending I didn't notice. FML

#21452257
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22967) - you deserved it (1632)

On 08/05/2015 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, the girl I've loved for years kissed me. Then she started crying and wiping her mouth, and had a panic attack. I had to help her through it, tell her that it was no big deal, and that it would never happen again. FML

Today, I found out what mouse intestines squashed against my bare feet feels like. FML

#21451813
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24104) - you deserved it (2409)

On 08/04/2015 at 3:19pm - animals - by whydoihavecats - United Kingdom

Today, my boss made me type up my own written warning, where I had to trash myself and describe my own "shocking incompetence". All the department heads are going to receive a copy of this. FML

#21451804
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22113) - you deserved it (2791)

On 08/04/2015 at 3:06pm - work - by ksa (man) - Poland (Slaskie)

Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML

#21451505
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23030) - you deserved it (1927)

On 08/03/2015 at 9:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: