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27161697

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27161697
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 16 December 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 939
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 12 posted

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27161697's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

#19851648
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21822) - you deserved it (1508)

On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML

#19833560
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20719) - you deserved it (3718)

On 06/23/2012 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML

#19822134
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27846) - you deserved it (8182)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:40am - kids - by Bad Mommy - United States (California)

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

#19810073
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40433) - you deserved it (3685)

On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

#19806269
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26812) - you deserved it (2701)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35083) - you deserved it (3816)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

#19791702
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9392) - you deserved it (17622)

On 06/15/2012 at 10:21am - kids - by habbsrule - Canada

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

#19784207
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12024) - you deserved it (22139)

On 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm - misc - by ww2freak - United States (Virginia)

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

#19776975
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38458) - you deserved it (3667)

On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)

Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight as condoms, you tramp," is probably the nicest greeting she's ever given me. FML

#19775546
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25401) - you deserved it (7857)

On 06/12/2012 at 7:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

#19771597
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17020) - you deserved it (1521)

On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

#19719938
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20268) - you deserved it (4426)

On 06/02/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by lol112 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28869) - you deserved it (1795)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML

#19263834
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5197) - you deserved it (23364)

On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States

Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML

#19159270
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30396) - you deserved it (7477)

On 02/25/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by badmom (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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