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27161697

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27161697
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 16 December 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 942
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 12 posted

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27161697's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

#20047830
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29434) - you deserved it (5864)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML

#20045566
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27681) - you deserved it (5417)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while housesitting my neighbor's dogs the phone rang. I answered it and a voice said, "Stop checking your Facebook and take care of my dogs. They look like they need to go out." FML

#20013194
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8278) - you deserved it (26146)

On 08/10/2012 at 7:42am - animals - by Bobby - United States (Nevada)

Today, I visited my mother's new apartment, and found a picture of yours truly hanging above her toilet, and I asked why it was there. She shrugged and said, "Because the thought of you makes me want to take a shit?" FML

#20007765
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14568) - you deserved it (1303)

On 08/07/2012 at 2:04pm - misc - by Alisha - United States (Virginia)

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML

#20000538
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15185) - you deserved it (9135)

On 08/03/2012 at 3:28pm - misc - by squeltorey (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52257) - you deserved it (9696)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52257) - you deserved it (9696)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52257) - you deserved it (9696)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

#19984594
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23071) - you deserved it (1792)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:14am - misc - by Lilragu97 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I went to a big family dinner. At one point, my cousin ran up to me, sobbing hysterically, holding his crotch, and making a huge scene. Turns out that while taking a piss, he "accidentally" swatted his willy with an electric bug zapper. I can't believe I'm related to this little shit. FML

#19941503
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18385) - you deserved it (2662)

On 07/15/2012 at 3:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML

#19939315
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28541) - you deserved it (4823)

On 07/15/2012 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28109) - you deserved it (3397)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML

#19902817
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9885) - you deserved it (22894)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by totallyembarassed - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML

#19867923
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21866) - you deserved it (3754)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16460) - you deserved it (4525)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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