Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

27161697

Search for a member

27161697

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 16 December 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4589
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 12 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

27161697's page activity

Visits<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 9:02pm<b>udderbutter</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 11:15pm<b>TheRealRiley</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 4:21pm<b>js48</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:12pm<b>obviouslywaffles</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 9:50pm<b>jaimeeelise23</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 2:51pm<b>DeathofCareBear</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 12:14pm<b>aishah77</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:17pm<b>spencer4148</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 10:41pm<b>simply_meeeee</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:55pm<b>acer145</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:32am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 3:13pm<b>GalaxyShots</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 11:27am<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 5:33am<b>jelrid</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:44pm<b>emotionalhentai</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 7:46pm<b>chefcow</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 10:23pm<b>gabiabi1</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 3:10am

Fucked!<b>udderbutter</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 5:15am<b>HolaAloha</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 3:45pm<b>spencer4148</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 4:41am<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 10:34am<b>jelrid</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 4:45am

27161697's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of 27161697's badges

27161697's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss called me Dave. Now everyone actually thinks my name is Dave. It's Nathan. I've been working there for 2 years. FML

#20181011
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25162) - you deserved it (2137)

On 11/27/2012 at 8:16am - work - by nato (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to my balls covered in Icy Hot, a big old "fuck you" note from my girlfriend, and my door slamming shut. I'm starting to get the distinct impression I shouldn't have made that off-hand remark last night about her PMSing, after she rage-quit a game of Mario Kart. FML

#20178502
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14320) - you deserved it (27607)

On 11/25/2012 at 5:38pm - love - by dumping time (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

#20176033
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28347) - you deserved it (2025)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)

Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML

#20175516
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24298) - you deserved it (1482)

On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML

#20161095
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23906) - you deserved it (3994)

On 11/12/2012 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27977) - you deserved it (2018)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML

#20156633
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23813) - you deserved it (3041)

On 11/09/2012 at 7:30pm - kids - by john r.t. (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33919) - you deserved it (3686)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I said "bless you" to a nice man who sneezed on the subway. That nice man has now followed me home and stood outside my apartment complex for two hours, claiming to be my "soulmate." FML

#20136351
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31677) - you deserved it (2576)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:22am - love - by prettylady? - United States

Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML

#20127667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31201) - you deserved it (1696)

On 10/22/2012 at 12:07am - work - by Lunazel93 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML

#20127252
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6635) - you deserved it (54267)

On 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about extinct peoples, and I said how close the Jewish people came to becoming one. She condescendingly told me they don't exist anymore. When I asked what she was talking about, I realized she was confusing them with the Vikings. What the hell? FML

#20126556
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23383) - you deserved it (2909)

On 10/21/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by tempted to become single (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

#20124199
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17984) - you deserved it (2013)

On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML

#20120590
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23469) - you deserved it (3951) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/17/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous - France (Bretagne)

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29115) - you deserved it (4848)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: