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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that me and her father's wedding is just a big joke and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

#21430948
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23861) - you deserved it (2517)

On 06/24/2015 at 12:02am - love - by bummed out step monster - United States (California)

Today, at my sister's wedding, she and I had a plan that she would purposely throw the bouquet to my girlfriend, then I would propose in front of everyone. When the bouquet landed in my girlfriend's lap, she screamed, "Ew, no way" and threw it to someone else. FML

#21430908
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30257) - you deserved it (3134)

On 06/23/2015 at 10:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I attended my best friend's wedding. Instead of throwing her bouquet, she turned around and handed it to me. I was the only single lady out of 150 guests. FML

#21430410
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27750) - you deserved it (2208)

On 06/22/2015 at 11:13pm - love - by hairstylistprobs - United States

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

#21430188
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25560) - you deserved it (2867)

On 06/22/2015 at 3:55pm - love - by Partners (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I took a nap. My boyfriend took this opportunity to go over to his "beautiful" and "amazing" ex-girlfriend's house to help her clean out her pool. I told him I didn't think that was appropriate. He told me I don't value relationships and didn't come home tonight. FML

#21429410
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23599) - you deserved it (2076)

On 06/21/2015 at 6:16am - love - by bev_rogan - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML

#21429236
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26662) - you deserved it (3711)

On 06/20/2015 at 9:59pm - love - by hotheadslav - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend came to my work, at a drive thru, in my car, and then got mad at me because I wouldn't give him free food. In his anger, he put my car in reverse and backed out of line very quickly, only to smash into a paying customer. FML

#21428964
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26940) - you deserved it (2583)

On 06/20/2015 at 6:45am - love - by ugh - United States (Florida)

Today, after weeks of my crazy girlfriend avoiding me because she knew I wanted to break up with her, I had no option but to do it by text. She told all my friends, who now think I'm a coward who isn't man enough to break up in person. They didn't even ask for my side of the story. FML

#21428807
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (4427)

On 06/19/2015 at 10:36pm - love - by Ngbaheir (man) - United Kingdom

Today, a cute guy asked me if I was single. When I said yes, he said "Yeah, you look like the type", and walked away. FML

#21428639
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26910) - you deserved it (2012)

On 06/19/2015 at 3:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my ex-boyfriend dumped sand into the crankcase of my truck and then filled it to the top with water after I dumped him for being immature and not respecting my things. FML

#21427999
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29198) - you deserved it (2998)

On 06/18/2015 at 8:36am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML

#21427425
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26164) - you deserved it (2061)

On 06/17/2015 at 3:42am - love - by canessadawn - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend told his friends he was dating me. We've been together for a year and a half. His friends didn't even know I existed before. FML

Today, I underwent surgery and feeling rather groggy upon being awoken, I very loudly declared, "I've always had a thing for doctors. Kiss me?" then promptly giggled, tried to launch myself in a random doctor's arms and fell flat on my face. FML

#21425055
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24935) - you deserved it (4158)

On 06/12/2015 at 3:43pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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