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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my father is really enjoying the iPhone my mother gave him for Christmas. He's enjoying it so much that he's already installed all sorts of dating apps. FML

#21508192
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20985) - you deserved it (1437)

On 12/26/2015 at 7:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Brazil (Santa Catarina)

Today, I opened my Christmas presents with my husband. One of the things he got me was a ball gag. "Yeah," he said with a grin, "That one's more for me but I didn't wanna buy myself headphones." Cue our son asking me what it was. FML

#21507419
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20222) - you deserved it (1936)

On 12/24/2015 at 6:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my wife and I decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with her side of the family. When we arrived at her parents' house, I heard her mother say that Christmas miracles don't exist since my wife brought me along. FML

#21507294
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21452) - you deserved it (1474)

On 12/24/2015 at 12:34pm - love - by smyp - Lithuania

Today, while lighting a cigar, I set my beard on fire. FML

#21507006
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17154) - you deserved it (13780)

On 12/23/2015 at 6:26pm - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I was bitched out by my shrew of a mother for getting engaged, to a man. She's not homophobic, but rather pissed off because gay marriage is "trendy" and she wants me to be "above that nonsense". Hurray for love. FML

#21506801
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21935) - you deserved it (3348)

On 12/23/2015 at 4:06am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's been a week since I flew down to stay with my long distance boyfriend. We went on long walks on the shore, under the stars, and had an unforgettable picnic viewing the sunset. I just now received a message of screenshots displaying him attempting to hook up with another girl. FML

#21506777
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21011) - you deserved it (1654)

On 12/23/2015 at 1:54am - love - by Nothing Special (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I wanted my boyfriend to meet my parents. My mum introduced herself as, "I'm Petra. I'm completely normal." FML

#21506615
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18450) - you deserved it (1908)

On 12/22/2015 at 4:45pm - love - by AustrianCow - Austria (Oberosterreich)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me during what was supposed to be a romantic getaway at a remote log cabin. FML

#21506547
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20706) - you deserved it (1460)

On 12/22/2015 at 11:53am - love - by pabj208 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to meet a guy that i had already started to be involved with at a bar. We laughed, kissed and had a great time, until he admitted he was just doing all of this to make his ex-girlfriend jealous. Guess who was waiting for me outside. FML

#21506427
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21535) - you deserved it (1685)

On 12/22/2015 at 12:50am - love - by ThankYou! - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend takes creepshots of me sleeping, and my mom likes them on her Instagram. FML

#21506177
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20227) - you deserved it (1974)

On 12/21/2015 at 9:56am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had fallen asleep in the back of a friend's car on the way home from a night out. When I woke up, they were in the middle of a full-on make out session. I had to pretend to be asleep for 20 minutes until they decided to "wake me up". FML

#21505784
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18915) - you deserved it (2880)

On 12/20/2015 at 8:26am - love - by mikmak - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I took a nap on the couch. Apparently, my wife decided to put makeup all over my face as I slept. She didn't tell me until after I went to the gas station to grab some beer. Looks like I will have to find a new place to buy beer from now on. FML

#21505521
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20377) - you deserved it (3450)

On 12/19/2015 at 2:20pm - love - by Sleeping Beauty - United States (New York)

Today, I complained about period cramps. My boyfriend said periods can't be that bad since "girls must orgasm every time they put a tampon in." FML

#21505128
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24238) - you deserved it (2024)

On 12/18/2015 at 11:37am - love - by periods (woman) - United States (California)



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