Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML

by AnnaNick / 02/13/2010 at 9:19pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a cute guy. After picking me up, he started to play on repeat, and sing to me, 'Happy Together' by The Turtles. For the entire 20 minute ride. FML

by girlie5445 / 02/13/2010 at 3:49am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, I was shopping at Walmart when I ran into this stalker chick. She introduced me to her baby. He's named after me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2010 at 12:48am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I caught my boyfriend of 8 years cheating on me. I punched him in the face, he broke up with me. And I still had to cook him an entire turkey dinner. FML

by Pushover / 02/12/2010 at 10:30pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read "it's over". FML

by blacklove / 02/12/2010 at 3:19pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I bought myself a flower for Valentine's Day to be delivered to myself from "Anonymous". FML

by mike4444 / 02/12/2010 at 1:11pm / Love

Today, I realized I can never live with my fiancée. A childhood of systematic teasing, abuse, and humiliation has made me terrified to use a bathroom around a guy if there's the slightest chance I can be heard, seen, or even have anyone know what I'm up to. Therapy has yet to fix anything. FML

by silentsuzie / 02/12/2010 at 10:23am / United States (Rhode Island) / Love

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to sleep over at his house. Then he found out that it was that time of the month for me, so he told me that he had to work this weekend and said "see you sometime next week." He doesn't have a job. FML

by JustMyLuck / 02/12/2010 at 9:14am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, the day of my 29th birthday and two weeks after our 10th wedding anniversary, the only thing my husband got me for my birthday was divorce papers. Happy birthday, bitch. FML

by Jeri / 02/12/2010 at 3:41am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I found out the guy I've been dating is heavily into a mystical card game and spends all of his money going to "Magic" card conventions across the country. FML

by anonymous / 02/12/2010 at 12:03am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was eating in the food court at the mall by myself but then a cute guy from my school offers to sit by me, I say yes of course, he then asks me for a french fry. Later on I realize he has eaten half my meal. He only wanted to sit by me for my food. FML

by purpledp12 / 02/11/2010 at 4:12am / United States / Love

Today, I was standing at the top of the stairs petting my dog. The doorbell rang and my dog bolted down the stairs, tripping me. I fell down the whole flight of stairs backwards. Turns out the person at the door was my brother who had locked himself out. I almost died for no reason. FML

by sari14 / 02/11/2010 at 1:14am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2010 at 7:03pm / United States (Illinois) / Love