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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I tried asking a guy I like on a date. He turned me down, saying that I "seem like a nice person and all", but after seeing those reality shows on truTV, he "would rather not date a Russian. No offense, though." FML

#21511782
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20373) - you deserved it (1423)

On 01/05/2016 at 1:49pm - love - by vanilla_blossom (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

#21511346
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20642) - you deserved it (1750)

On 01/04/2016 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend was so drunk at a New Years party that he approached me and asked me who I was. FML

#21510574
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19373) - you deserved it (1573)

On 01/02/2016 at 10:57am - love - by anon - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I celebrated my 4-year anniversary with my girlfriend. We didn't have sex and we didn't even kiss. All I got to do was cuddle the stuffed Minion she got me for Christmas. FML

#21510303
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20456) - you deserved it (3052)

On 01/01/2016 at 5:41pm - love - by no love - United States

Today, I was talking to myself in the bathroom to remind myself of what chores I need to do. My husband overheard me and is now convinced that I was on the phone with someone. No amount of proof, logic or reasoning can convince him that I'm not cheating on him. FML

Today, my girlfriend furiously bitched me out because I got more upset about my phone screen cracking than when she told me about the death of her cat. We hadn't even met when her cat died. Did she expect me to burst into tears from hearing the story? Guess who's single again! FML

#21510107
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21838) - you deserved it (3029)

On 01/01/2016 at 5:33am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend let me stay over at her house for the first time. I went into her room only to find out she's obsessed with the Joker and has a bunch of posters and toys of him. I am deathly afraid of clowns. FML

#21509727
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22540) - you deserved it (3518)

On 12/31/2015 at 11:40am - love - by ScaredOfClowns (man) - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after I told her that I'd never watched The Lion King. FML

#21509521
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19395) - you deserved it (8193)

On 12/30/2015 at 9:41pm - love - by hakuna_matata (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my wife has been taking "love thy neighbour" very literally with the bloke next door. FML

#21509012
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22517) - you deserved it (1394)

On 12/29/2015 at 9:15am - love - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has a Facebook account. He said he didn't have one. Apparently he's not divorced after all. FML

#21508989
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23549) - you deserved it (2099)

On 12/29/2015 at 7:04am - love - by debiebs (woman) - Brazil (Bahia)

Today, after dating this girl for 3 months, I finally introduced her to my friends. She looked panicked during the date, and after it she broke up with me. When I asked why, she told me she could try to deal with a black friend, but not with a gay one. I've been dating a moron all this time. FML

#21508983
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23822) - you deserved it (2406)

On 12/29/2015 at 6:07am - love - by Alien (man) - Switzerland

Today, my boyfriend's dad came onto me. I was shocked and awkwardly tried to exit the situation. My boyfriend then sprang out and started shouting at me. Apparently, it was a "test" to see if I would still be attracted to him in 30 years. I failed. What. The. Fuck. FML

#21508382
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27805) - you deserved it (1648)

On 12/27/2015 at 12:31pm - love - by _schaden_freude - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my father is really enjoying the iPhone my mother gave him for Christmas. He's enjoying it so much that he's already installed all sorts of dating apps. FML

#21508192
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20984) - you deserved it (1437)

On 12/26/2015 at 7:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Brazil (Santa Catarina)



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