Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML

by mynameisarmpit / 11/15/2010 at 1:48am / Love

Today, my fiancé admitted to me that the only reason he's attracted to me and asked me to marry him is because I look and act like his favorite anime character. FML

Today, I saw that my ex-boyfriend was online and had no plans. I felt extreme happiness knowing he had no life. Then I realized that I was online and had no plans. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2010 at 6:09pm / Love

Today, I was walking back to campus with my boyfriend when we passed an Irish pub called "Fat Belly's." He put his arm around me, patted my stomach, and said "Yay! It's your restaurant!" FML

by freedomofmusic / 11/14/2010 at 1:54pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend came over with a broken engraved bracelet that I paid 50 dollars for. I was so angry but when I stated "I am going to call them and get a new one!" my boyfriend said back to me "No it's okay, I didn't really like it anyways." It was for our 2 year anniversary. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2010 at 3:46am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I came home to my family remodeling our (extremely) out of date bathroom. I was SUPER excited to help them get it done. I walked down the hallway and opened my bedroom door to find a huge, gaping hole in my wall and my room covered in dust. I had to sweep every surface in my room. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 8:39pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, was my girlfriend's birthday. I planned it to perfection: we went shopping, bowling, had lunch in a nice Italian restaurant, watched a French comedy, walked by the river. She also got many presents. Tonight, I was exhausted but happy for her... until she told me her birthday is tomorrow. FML

by frenchboyfriend / 11/13/2010 at 7:28pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found that my "lesbian" best friend and roommate is now dating the guy I've been trying to get a date with for weeks. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 6:00pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me I was the only girl he'd ever text, call, or flirt with again. Later on he told two other girls exactly the same thing on Facebook, not realizing that everybody can read wall messages. FML

by girlwithaprob / 11/13/2010 at 4:45pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML

by sadinmass / 11/13/2010 at 8:24am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my girlfriend thought she was stronger than me so we arm wrestled. She won. I used both hands. FML

by looke27 / 11/13/2010 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I realised I haven't had a date in so long that I actually seriously considered meeting someone from online, purely based on the fact he could spell properly. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 1:09am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML

by tmac05 / 11/13/2010 at 12:13am / United States (California) / Love