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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

#8409963
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21467) - you deserved it (3771)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:08pm - love - by gp28 - United States

Today, my parents decided they won't pay for college because of a Fox News story that said higher education "makes you liberal." FML

#8402650
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38056) - you deserved it (2899)

On 02/18/2010 at 8:20am - love - by merse - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after 25 years of marriage and 2 children, I was served with divorce papers. It turns out my 51 year old, soon to be ex, has been having an affair with the 24 year old tutor I hired to help our daughter bring her grades up. They are in love and want to start a new family together as soon as possible. FML

#8400921
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41616) - you deserved it (2547)

On 02/18/2010 at 4:51am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend got drunk and cheated on me. After I tried to talk to her about it, she dumped me. Not because she didn't like me anymore or that she liked the other guy, but because she felt "too guilty" and "wouldn't be able to look me in the eyes anymore." FML

#8400274
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27676) - you deserved it (3036)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:58am - love - by Dumped (man) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML

#8394792
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23071) - you deserved it (4197)

On 02/18/2010 at 12:07am - love - by loveless - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in school and spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her I broke her nose. FML

#8376672
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11486) - you deserved it (33934)

On 02/17/2010 at 3:44pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I received a letter in the mail. The letter was from a woman who explained to me every single detail of a three month affair she had with my husband. She included pictures. FML

#8375292
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41293) - you deserved it (2330)

On 02/17/2010 at 2:49pm - love - by tj85 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the only guy showing slightly any interest in me is a Nazi-obsessed psychopath. He uses lovely pick-up lines such as, "Hey, do you know how much it hurts to staple your hand?" FML

#8368269
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28036) - you deserved it (2620)

On 02/17/2010 at 5:49am - love - by LoveDrug (woman) - Ireland

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend asked me out was because the fortune ball app on his iPod told him to. FML

#8364969
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23273) - you deserved it (3056)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:38am - love - by amireallyloved - United States (California)

Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML

#8364770
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38118) - you deserved it (3827)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - love - by lynn (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were waiting for the bus. The weather had been cold and snowy recently, and I realized I'd forgotten my transit card. She nonetheless got on the bus without me. I had to walk it alone in the snow. FML

#8361360
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21767) - you deserved it (8549)

On 02/17/2010 at 12:03am - love - by kippis05 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found my company car wrecked in a ditch. Apparently, leaving it parked on an icy hill all night was a bad idea. I have to pick up my manager from the airport. FML

#8350634
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7847) - you deserved it (24904)

On 02/16/2010 at 8:29pm - love - by croleymd - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me a really sweet poem that he wrote for me. I think it was secondhand - the first letter of each verse spelled his ex girlfriend's name. FML

#8347033
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30289) - you deserved it (2230)

On 02/16/2010 at 7:00pm - love - by blaze (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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