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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I found out a 6-month pregnant woman is claiming my boyfriend to be the father. Even though this would have been previous to our relationship, he already has two kids from getting girls pregnant in high school. I guess he didn't learn his lesson the first two times. FML

#13708556
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27389) - you deserved it (16044)

On 11/03/2010 at 11:16pm - love - by bummed (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my fiancé told me it was a mistake to propose to me. FML

#13688887
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39850) - you deserved it (5225)

On 11/02/2010 at 3:11pm - love - by secret - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my boyfriend told me that if he was to break up with me, he would do it in a crowded location so I couldn't start to cry or make a scene. FML

#13685812
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29479) - you deserved it (4843)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, I discovered that the upside of losing weight is that men have started hitting on me. The downside? They're all twice my age. FML

#13684302
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27964) - you deserved it (4232)

On 11/02/2010 at 2:50am - love - by stillyoung (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dad, who lives hours away, called and told me he was getting married. Today. As in this evening. Guess I'm not invited. FML

#13672466
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30350) - you deserved it (2427)

On 11/01/2010 at 6:15am - love - by Googlebug - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend borrowed my Jane Norman dress to wear to a Halloween party. He got hammered, threw up all over it, and fell unconscious on the shower floor. FML

#13664079
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22154) - you deserved it (7486)

On 10/31/2010 at 2:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

#13655467
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20638) - you deserved it (26277)

On 10/30/2010 at 10:14pm - love - by yummy(: - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were fighting in the car, I paused to take a bite of my burrito. Just at that moment, he slammed on the brakes, causing me to deepthroat my burrito. I threw up all over myself. He won the argument. FML

#13648057
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32995) - you deserved it (8608)

On 10/30/2010 at 9:40am - love - by serendipity1027 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother got remarried. I am now officially older than my step-father. FML

#13646131
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49678) - you deserved it (3018)

On 10/30/2010 at 2:33am - love - by Stephie2009 - United States

Today, I went to see Paranormal Activity 2 with my boyfriend. In hopes of him putting his arm around me or holding my hand, I told him that I was very scared and pretended to cry a little. He told me to be quiet because I was ruining the movie for him. Then he moved seats. FML

#13645625
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23982) - you deserved it (40958)

On 10/30/2010 at 1:41am - love - by Samantha - United States (Washington)

Today, my own boyfriend admitted that he can't name one single thing he likes about me without naming something "physical." FML

#13642376
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29022) - you deserved it (6240)

On 10/29/2010 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I sent the girl I like a Twinkie with a note saying "Enjoy! You deserve it". I found out later through an angry email that someone had written "you damn fatty" on the end of the note. FML

#13641335
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30246) - you deserved it (6672)

On 10/29/2010 at 7:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally mustered up the guts to ask this girl I like to dinner and a movie. She agreed on the terms that she could bring someone, and I'd said it wouldn't be a problem. When I met up with her a few hours later, I found out she'd brought her boyfriend. FML

#13639507
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (6392)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:02pm - love - by Mal (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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