Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML

by Penkkis / 09/13/2011 at 2:11am / Finland (Lapland) / Love

Today, my 23 year old boyfriend of 2 years was forced to dump me, over the phone, by his mother. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2011 at 4:43am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my father in law drunkenly announced at dinner that he wished my husband had married my best friend. No one stuck up for me. Not even my husband. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2011 at 12:19am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, the really cute guy who asked for my number last night texted me. He wanted to know if he could get my friend's number, because he'd been too shy to ask her directly. FML

by chicagobulls102 / 09/10/2011 at 2:19pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I found out that the man who offered to put up the woman I love in exchange for me helping out with his rent, has in fact been her "other" boyfriend since before she moved in. FML

by Just me / 09/09/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

by Angie / 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm / France / Love

Today, I wrote a fake phone number on my neck to make it look like someone had hit on me. FML

by Kevin / 09/09/2011 at 8:10am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

by I_dislike_Twilight / 09/08/2011 at 8:52am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I found out my 97-year-old Grandma has an imaginary 30-year-old boyfriend. I laughed until my mom said, "She's still doing better than you. You don't even have an imaginary boyfriend, let alone a real one." FML

by Anonymous / 09/07/2011 at 12:30am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, my boyfriend let me know that when we met, he wouldn't have even talked to me if I was as fat as I am now. But lucky for me, he stays with me because, "there's love or something." FML

by emopoe / 09/06/2011 at 11:11am / United States / Love

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he didn't believe in marriage. His response was, "I believe in marriage. Just not marriage with you." FML

by jellyybean / 09/05/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

by ddll / 09/04/2011 at 9:27pm / Singapore / Love

Today, my boyfriend bitched me out for being too controlling. Apparently, not only am I being unreasonable by not wanting him visiting strip clubs with his friends, I'm also just "looking for excuses to get mad" at him. FML

by inlovewithstupid / 09/04/2011 at 12:40pm / United States (Texas) / Love