Today, I talked to my high school sweetheart after 12 years. He confessed that he's been single ever since we broke up, never got over me, and that to this day he loves me dearly. I'm a married mother of two. FML

by :/ / 03/12/2016 at 6:36am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, my ex-boyfriend decided to humiliate me by confessing to my dad in detail what he and I had done together and "apologizing" for taking my virginity. FML

by awkwardmandy / 03/11/2016 at 1:28pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, my wife, the budding environmentalist, who is also 6 months pregnant, threatened to leave me because according to her I'm responsible for the world's deforestation. I'd only drawn her a picture of her with our baby-to-be. FML

by Ecolo-girl / 03/11/2016 at 1:22am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, my father informed me that he plans to play a drum solo instead of making a speech at my wedding. And yes, he IS completely serious. FML

by DrumrollPlease / 03/10/2016 at 8:59pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love

Today, a student came out to me, saying that she thinks she's gay. This has happened several times since I have taught here, which made me wonder why they were comfortable telling me. Turns out being a single, childless woman of my age screams "lesbian" to this particular community. I'm not. FML

by phalangesenfuego / 03/10/2016 at 9:07am / United States (Washington) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I've been so accustomed to kissing my girlfriend that when I gave my best bud a hug, I kissed him on the neck. FML

by billjoebob424 / 03/09/2016 at 7:01pm / Canada / Love

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

by atleasthelistened / 03/09/2016 at 3:04am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, an attractive woman sat beside me at the doctor's office. Unfortunately, on my other side was my senile old uncle who can't control his bowels, and after a few uncontrollable farts, she was on the other side of the room. FML

by thanksgrandpa / 03/08/2016 at 3:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I actually had to reassure the girl I'm seeing that she can't "catch" my epilepsy. FML

by the fuck? / 03/05/2016 at 4:49am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I introduced my kind and amazing Iranian boyfriend to my mother. When he went to use the rest room, she warned me to "knock it off with this Bin Laden fetish" or she'll have me put on psychiatric hold. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2016 at 1:58am / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Love

Today, some guys came up to me at work so they could meet me in person after talking to me on Tinder. I don't have a Tinder account, though, and I have no idea who is doing this. FML

by Why me? / 03/05/2016 at 12:22am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my mum asked when she's getting grandkids. I had to tell her that, at 21 years old, I hadn't even managed to get a boyfriend yet. FML

by loser / 03/01/2016 at 7:20pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Love

Today, I had to pee in a cup. The cup almost overflowed. My first instinct was to drink some so it didn't spill. FML

by killme / 02/29/2016 at 2:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Love