Love: Today, I tripped and while trying to break my fall accidentally... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Anonymous - 24/04/2016 03:48 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I tripped and while trying to break my fall accidentally punched my calculus professor in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16

You deserved it 6

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Today, my cat has always been rather antisocial, but after his first trip to the vet since getting fixed, he's become talkative, clingy, and goofy. I'd enjoy it, if not for the fact that he's nearly hurt himself several times because he keeps doing stupid shit. He might need to go back to the vet at this rate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 623

You deserved it 130

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 622

You deserved it 34 712

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Today, I was talking to my aunt about my brother's recent arrest for drug possession. I proudly told her that I have never done drugs of any kind. Her response: "Well, actually you were born addicted to heroin, so you had a drug problem long before your brother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 095

You deserved it 3 741

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I agree, your life sucks 8 924

You deserved it 1 253

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I agree, your life sucks 4 503

You deserved it 877

Today, I texted my flatmate to ask him when he would be paying his portion of the rent, since he has told me he would be late this month. He wrote back to inform me that he had moved out last night while I was away, and that he won't be paying me anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 181

You deserved it 2 459

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I agree, your life sucks 926

You deserved it 162

Today, on my way for a vacation, my car started misfiring, so I called a tow truck. Forty minutes later, the tow truck arrived. He then said that he had just gotten another priority call, so he was leaving, and someone would be back in another hour to get us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 521

You deserved it 180