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Today, I saw my dad help himself to a sex stamina drink. He and mom share the hotel bed next to mine. FML

#7336128
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20240) - you deserved it (2255)

On 01/14/2010 at 9:54am - intimacy - by windskurfer - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend asked me "is it in yet?" FML

#7335788
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29904) - you deserved it (6729)

On 01/14/2010 at 9:06am - intimacy - by anun (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML

#7325738
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21610) - you deserved it (3053)

On 01/13/2010 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by cantgetitupcantgetiton (woman) - United States

Today, I met my boyfriend's notoriously difficult mother. I had been looking forward to meeting her and making a good impression. Unfortunately, I could not greet her as her son's penis was still in my mouth. FML

#7318001
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31071) - you deserved it (15495)

On 01/13/2010 at 11:42am - intimacy - by pleasedtomeetyou (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket. I had to sell condoms and chocolate frosting to my ex. FML

#7306098
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28186) - you deserved it (2714)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:05pm - intimacy - by Narehs (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37366) - you deserved it (3185)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML

#7300366
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10915) - you deserved it (33212)

On 01/12/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by loveade11 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was in the middle of having sex with my girlfriend. I told her that I loved her. She asked me how much wind-shield wiper blades cost. FML

#7296803
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21789) - you deserved it (3182)

On 01/12/2010 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Upbrakie - United States

Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML

#7293990
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29837) - you deserved it (8896)

On 01/12/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by cold-n-stinky (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that pinching the tip of the condom before you roll it down to the base is NOT a suggestion. FML

#7268180
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6367) - you deserved it (24561)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by Drewzter (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom explained the benefits of douching to me with my boyfriend right there. He began arguing with her about how the vagina is usually self-cleaning. FML

#7263265
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21255) - you deserved it (2446)

On 01/10/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by CD (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I lost my virginity to my long time boyfriend and found out I'm severely allergic to latex. I also found out that my family doctor had been transferred to the ER. He went to play golf with my dad later. FML

#7257583
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21827) - you deserved it (3350)

On 01/10/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by Foxy (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I propositioned my boyfriend of two years to have sex with me in the shower to spice up our love life. He said that he was really busy. He was playing Call of Duty. FML

#7255890
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22234) - you deserved it (5794)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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