Love, Cute and Intimacy: Romance ain't dead

Romance ain't dead

By awkwardbf - 09/09/2009 01:26 - United States

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriend's lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said, "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 977

You deserved it 4 884

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Bad timing

By KrissyBearr - 31/12/2011 01:36 - United States

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 407

You deserved it 10 010

By Anonymous - 29/06/2010 17:34 - Canada

Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 719

You deserved it 25 754

By Anonymous - 04/10/2009 21:40 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 691

You deserved it 48 832

By princess - 12/04/2014 21:01 - United States - San Marcos

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky, and I whispered that I love him. He immediately lost his boner, and a few minutes later "remembered" he had to be somewhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 558

You deserved it 7 159

By Username - 23/11/2010 06:50

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 506

You deserved it 14 021

Classy

By Username - 07/06/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear, "It's not gonna suck itself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 957

You deserved it 13 034

By grossedout - 01/11/2014 00:39

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 032

You deserved it 3 717

Romantic afterglow

By easyontheeyes1 - 01/05/2020 02:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Immediately after we'd finished, he said, "Get off, you're making it hard to breathe on top of me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 755

You deserved it 475

By bugger - 22/02/2015 17:31

Today, I looked my boyfriend in the eyes and said "I love y-" He cut me off with, "Babe, a blowjob's worth a thousand words" and held eye contact until I awkwardly excused myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 056

You deserved it 5 171

So hard

By JessicaandGhazi - 09/06/2020 08:04

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in bed after having sex. I commented on him still having an erection after having an orgasm. He said it happens whenever he has a strong orgasm. Then he added, "And surprisingly, I was even thinking about you when it happened." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 643

You deserved it 304

lphchld 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:52

The man spoke the truth.

mastory96 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 13:58

haha watch he'll probably get a boner from the slight vibration.

Comments

untoldfame 3

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:45

lol. it happens.

butterflyhearts 0

Sunday 23 May 2010 5:46

agreed

lphchld 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 9:52

The man spoke the truth.

joeyisinsane 0

Tuesday 29 June 2010 22:09

next time use ninja pro

jessicadawg 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 10:04

Lol. Well at least he was honest.

moriah 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 10:10

fyl? no, not really.

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 10:38

The force is strong in that one,

silly_kate 0

Tuesday 15 September 2009 12:54

WIN!!!!!

zakh508 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 19:25

lol

asher888 11

Tuesday 15 June 2010 7:11

lol

hqwoody327 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 10:58

I'd be flattered!

ladiesman14 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 11:39

i can feel it too.

owaiz 1

Wednesday 9 September 2009 11:49

That was sweet lol.

pleasedonttellme 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 13:44

Romantic -_-

mastory96 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 13:58

haha watch he'll probably get a boner from the slight vibration.

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The Top

Today, I told my ultra-Catholic mother that I was hanging out with a girl. While walking out of the flat, I didn't realize that I'd dropped one of my condoms out of my pocket. My mother saw it and ripped it apart, then yelled at me that, "Sex is for having children! You're giving yourselves to Satan!" I'm 20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 319

Today, a guy for whom I did a design job told me he would only be able to pay me in 3 weeks. I told him that it was OK, as long as I didn't have to follow him around to collect my money. "Don't worry, I know the feeling," he said, "I used to run an illegal business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 513

You deserved it 2 171

The Top

Today, while working at my unfulfilling part-time job, my colleague said, "Are you aware of how much you sigh?" And then she said, "You're too young for that." So, am I supposed to hold my breath now? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 515

You deserved it 549

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 420

You deserved it 6 105

Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 337

You deserved it 7 901

Today, I arranged a date with a girl online I really get along with, because frankly we both have a filthy sense of humour and love sexting. At the date, it turns out she’s deaf, which is not a problem, but she brought her sister as an interpreter. Without our usual conversation, it was just painfully awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 124

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 352

You deserved it 29 505

Today, I met my biological father for the first time. He seemed to be slightly intoxicated from the outset, and less than half an hour later, he had tried to intimidate me into "loaning" him several hundred euros for reasons he wouldn't tell me. So long, "dad". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 303

You deserved it 3 104