My eyes! My eyes!

By someone - 29/07/2011 18:26 - United States

Spicy
Today, while walking home, the gods were kind enough to grace me with the sight of an old man jogging past me in nothing but a pair of short shorts. The image of his balls swinging to and fro underneath like a pendulum has been forever burned into my retinas. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 820
You deserved it 5 380

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Some acid will get that image right off. :)

Comments

Some acid will get that image right off. :)

docbastard75 5

It would blind her yes,but the image is still saved in their occipital lobe. Hey be lucky he wasn't related to you or the image would constantly resurface, lol that's what happened to me :(

Xx_Dakota_xX 1
chester75 5

Well yeah who isn't turned on by a man in short shorts, and the older the better.

CattyPurry 0

just like wine. the older, the better. ;)

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

Zout prob works better than bleach

tandem123 6

goo gone mixed with Tabasco is exceptionally good at removing those images.

Hey YDI for thinking there was more than one god ;p

he's probably running to the beach to go skinny dipping.

Idonebeenhad 17

You're probably suffering from stupidity.

I like the part where you kept looking. Whenever I accidentally glance at a woman's chest and notice that her nipples are showing through her shirt, I don't keep looking long enough to see whether the breasts will sway around... I immediately look away. Obviously you liked what you saw.

Swaying women breasts = swinging old man testicles?

freshV43 0

He's probably not SUFFERING from stupidity. After all, ignorance is bliss right?

Why would you want to picture that? *shivers*

you should kick him right there so he won't run naked again

CattyPurry 0

at least he didn't squat down on his knees infront of you and "drop it like it's hawt" xD

rallets 22

johnny knoxville up to his old shenanigans

TheChampagneBoi 5

a vodka could help erase it but that sucks

op, my language arts teacher would love to have a copy of this. she has been looking for a good example of using sensory details to make the reader feel like they are there. well, I felt like I saw the balls myself.

at least it's not burned into your tv screen

What kind of God do you worship, OP?

This is the best worded FML I have ever read. Bravo OP, bravo.

IphonFML 6

the way u worded this FML actually pissed me off

juicedboi 7

It was like a grandfather clock, without the "L"...

evry1luvspuns 0

Do your balls hang low do they wobble to the floor...

168- why? Too many "big words" for you too? I should think so, seeing as you can't even take the time to write out the word "you". I thought the wording of the FML made it even more amusing.

One of those things where it's just so ugly you can't stop looking at it.

talktomandybaby 8

omfg. that is disgusting. I am so sorry. FYL

sandwichmaterial 5
hello_jules 8

you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. haha :)

silversti 0

or wrong place at the right time?....think about it....

Big words? Like what? Pendulum? Wow you're super clever...

"So.Many.Big.Words!" I can't help but wonder what you do in times of actual crises. "Too.Many.Thoughts.Brain.Overloading.Ahhh.jdfdljfnirubcjdannaoefuenjddc."

burninnapalm 5

words too big? me help with ouchy pain in head. pendulum, means big swingy thing. retinas. mean thing in seeing balls in head that let's you see through seeing balls. is ouchy pain all gone? (ps. that's was harder than I thought it would be to type... sorry if I made an "ouchy pain in you heads" :p)

Antidisestablishmentarianism. There's a big word for you.

broomhildo 19

So.Many.Capital.Letters.And.Periods!

rallets 22

trolling win guys, good work

hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia. Now that's a big word.

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis

burninnapalm 5

Lopadotemachoselachogaleokranioleipsanodrimhypotrimmatosilphioparaomelitokatakechymenokichlepikossyphophattoperisteralektryonoptekephalliokigklopeleiolagoiosiraiobaphetraganopterygon Aka the longest word ever to be printed... and it's a food dish! (imagine having to order that) that took a while to type... let alone say

look up the scientific name for "titen"

Why is your head an explosion? Probably because of all those big words.

tacocannon99 5

it's hot. I for one want George bush in assless chaps bending over, for me to smack his velvety butcheeks with a tinsel and leather anal whip.

Goodatbeingbad 9

Even though you're joking, that's extremely disturbing.

It's funny, because if Boners made that comment, it would be at +100ish instead of buried.

tacocannon99 5

well I didn't mean to hurt feelings. the only scarier thing is that I say this even when I'm not on the Internet.

beaglegun 0

He will still look better than you. (; Stupid democratic communist!

tacocannon99 5

well beaglegun, I didn't know you felt that way... *satanically spawns a scalpel and rips out my crumbly urethra* and also, hes republican the practical opposite of a communist. which is you, a communist Cuban lady with small breasts who enjoyes making sweet love to her sheep's spiky rectums, especially using a nailgun for extra rectal stimulation.

Ummmm. You've put some thought into this. Was it while you were at Brokeback Mountain?

tacocannon99 5

phatdaddy... what the ****? for your information I went to two mountains, and they were your moms sagging breasts, pleading to be torn from her crumbled shoulders. it's summer vacation, and I'm going into eighth grade. I don't have a ton to do.

Goodatbeingbad 9

Umm, you're going into eighth grade and you talk like this? How old are you? Thirteen? Your momma ought to slap you!

tacocannon99 5