By hairless - 30/07/2010 06:45 - Australia

Spicy
Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 419
You deserved it 10 119

Same thing different taste

Top comments

That's basically a guy who wants a permanent excuse to not go down on you, OP. :P

Sounds like your boyfriend is full of excuses tell him to man up or you aren't returning the favor

Comments

isaiaha11 2

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cubanchick 0

it's all excuses. ydi for changing yourself to please a man

The_grumpy_bear 0

Your bf needs to get over it! He didn't want hair and now it's gone. Most guys would be all over that. Tell him to quit being a whiney bitch and start eating!

next time just go Brazilian and tell him to stop the BS!

killersnake33 0

your pic looks like the care bear is getting raped by the pig lol

wow so u go through pain just so he would go down on you......lol u must love him and want him to do that to go through that crazy

it's funny because you went from one extreme to the other and he still won't sleep with you.

The_grumpy_bear 0

And that's why he's grumpy. He wanted to get it on with the unicorn in the back of the claw machine.

Averizzle 0

Lol your bf doesn't deserve you.. If he won't get over himself long enough to satisfy you then leave him. Booty.. Is more important than drinking water.

Well you could start making porno's with random dudes since you already have a xxx wax

The_grumpy_bear 0

wth double posting fail 

maybe he just doesn't wanna go down on you ever so he said that not expecting you to get a wax

he's probably getting laid by some other girl. :/ Queensland FTW!

He sounds like a douche. Don't waste your time with him!

TheSarge 0

#16 it's funny because you look so stupid everytime you explain why the FML is funny. do you always tell the whole world everytime you understand something?

ninjaj31 0
eazyeeze 0

What the hell is an XXX wax? Just specify what it is...why the censorship? Scared of the FCC? It's called PUSSY!  And your boyfriend is the man-controlling you like that! 

Lol 121, if your going to correct her, do it right. The actual word for it is ******. But good try, love. :)

kittykataclysm 0

102, It's funny because actually you're the one who looks stupid an doesn't get it :) he's referring to family guy. You're welcome for the explanation

actuallyyyy not trying to be a dick or anything, but the part that you would wax is called the vulva. you would be in rediculous pain if you waxed ur ******, and for no reason since it has no hair. (: just sayin

twinny_sc 13

It's too bad your boyfriend is a weird douche who just uses excuses so he doesn't have to go down on you.

RecklessJellyBea 7

When someone has a hairy vag, you people tell them to shave, but when they shave, it's a ydi because they changed themselves.. I don't get you people.

he's obviously gay that's why he is avoiding you

cbr600_fml 0

ur boyfriend is retarted I'll be all over that ******

Boygenius50 8

They mean "us people" of FML. . .and they're right. People on FML will ALWAYS think of a reason to sat YDI. part of the fun

Normally I would say "YDI for not being a lesbian", but your boyfriend is truly a moron. FYL

FMyLifeCereal 0

He's clearly disguising his own impotence and/or homosexuality.

WallyTheWombat 0
ninjaj31 0

43-- you have an amazing body. just thought you would like to know. :)

its funny cause you dont realise your BF likes men

babyale760 0

op, probably he just doesn't want to sleep with you. get a clue. lol jk but forreals fyl

your bf needs an ultimatum. being a guy I wouldn't ever say this but he deserves it. close the shop till he decides to get over it.

OP I think u need a real man as a boyfriend lol

kryz08 0

#140 nice boobies, can I lick it 

actually 141, the vulva is The external genital organs of the female ncluding the labia majora, labia minora, clitor and vestibule of the ******. last I heard waxing a clit is unnecessary and also painful.

Wait a second, #6. YDI for wanting to please a man? This site is so confusing. If the FML were something like "Today, my man wouldn't go down on me because I had a jungle down there. FML"...A LOT of people would be like "YDI FOR NOT TRIMMING YOUR BUSH! YDI FOR NOT SHAVING! GORILLA!" Just like with this one, people say YDI FOR CHANGING TO TRY AND PLEASE YO MAN I'm so sick of hearing this! Everyone has their own taste! Is it just me or does it feel like we can never win in this?

233, it's too late for that. If you weren't a complete waste of sperm and egg, you would notice that the bf already denied her.

Um that would hurt... it's actually a BIKINI WAX. Yes. the bikini is above your ******.

I'd be all over you going down you would be hard to get me back up

Actually that's incorrect as well.The ****** is literally the "inside part" of a woman's sex organs. I doubt she waxed her vaginal canal. Pussy is just a cuter word for labia.

DMarie2014 5

Ate next time just do some hair, not too much no less to wear its bare slim. Just kinda like trimmed I guess

That's basically a guy who wants a permanent excuse to not go down on you, OP. :P

number 3 no body would go down in you because your an ugly bitch

...Where do you want me to start, Cody? The fact that either you have no room to talk or that you've taken your pic from the internet and therefore should know better than to judge by avatars on the net and therefore you're just attempting to provoke a response out of me? Or the fact that you're not original because so many people have already insulted my looks on this site? Or the fact that fml is not a website dedicated for people to comment on other people but to comment on the subject at hand - the original fml posted and people's thoughts about it?

Cody, put up a real picture before you insult others, you coward piece of shit. You're not the arbiter of beauty - I'm sure she's had plenty of boyfriends she wants and all the sex she wants. In summary, you're a dick.

STFU, 43. She was rightly defending herself from a jackass. And Cinn, don't listen to the bastards on the Internet - you're fly. :)

cantfightfate 0

you guys are mean. she's not even ugly and I'm sure plenty of guys would sleep with her. you're just bitter because you're probably even uglier and a virgin. and who wouldn't be offended by that comment? I know I would. y'all can go to hell.

I think it's perfectly reasonable to be offended by someone calling you an ugly bitch. As for "the truth", beauty is a subjective thing. What you might find ugly someone else might find stunningly beautiful. Besides, you don't know whether Cinn is getting any or not so you can't call it the truth.

#3 looks like my English teacher. 

@camxavier - So I'm not allowed to be intelligent to reply to those who insult me (reguardless of whether or not you agree with them)? Now that just takes all the fun out of it. I also never said that I wasn't offended, but if you must know, I'm both used to the insults and am very bored. So I responded how I felt fit to do so. @ndizzle, cantfightfate & liberal_spice - Thank you. I particularly agree with Liberal_spice for saying that everyone's opinions differ. Some people find some things attractive that repulse others. It's the way things are.

DuckOnAStick 0

You dont even have a pic so stfu.

Cinn, don't worry about the assholes on here. I would like to make one point though--it's not a real permanent excuse, since the hair was waxed. It grows back ;) Good argument, though!

I rarely make comments but Cinn is a pretty girl, that's just such an awful thing to say, even if it is trolling. What is so wrong with people that they have do that?

I don't worry about them too much, Steph, it's good stress relief to shout at them. :) And it is a permanent excuse because not only does he "feel like a paedophile" when she's got it waxed, but he also "doesn't like the hair" in the first place. So it works all the time. The OP should do what some people have suggested, not to go down on him until he does on her. Moonshine_bek, some people feel the need to make themselves feel 'cool' by insulting other people whether or not it be in real life or over the internet. I don't understand why, but they do. But thanks. Camxavier, that is true. But I'm bored, so I'm going to reply. :P

That_Guy_Jake_JR 0

Wow, bunch of jerks on this site. Nobody can judge anybody, it's a website and we all have our flaws/insecurities. And to call someone out on something UNtrue in the comments section of an FML...is just pathetic. Cinn=beautiful :)

43- stfu what's the point of showing your abs? insecure bitch, take a picture of your face next time instead of dissing others. >:( btw, Cinn is really pretty and I love her hair! also Cody, your pretty stupid dissing someone on fml...while there are retards that agree with you, the majority of people would find your comment offensive to cinn and defend her. >:(

X18GirlX 0

you really are beautiful Cinn

X18GirlX 0

Agreed on boys showing abs. it's stupid,

lickmyjock 0

cinn is pretty... you keep at it girl!

halowarz25 0

And guess who got the final laugh? Cody. congrats you guys just got trolled.

I like his abs... something nice to look at for me.

EvilDave 13

@ 33 I beg to differ. I, for one, would. Therefore you are wrong. Thanks for playing.

86-Cinn is definitely beautiful.... AND your eye make up is awesome!

knight0748 5

totally disagreeing with Cody, Cinn is fine. I'll hit that, in a totally respecting manner. and also X18... preferably together. As for Cody, I won't touch that even if my life depends on it. Even if the survival of the human race depending on it, I won't tap that fatty.

Hump_Zilla 0

first of all Cinn you're not ugly...but I don't think it is a permanent thing completely....she could always try a landing strip or the cute lil triangle or heart above it that way enough hair is removed as to not be tickling the face to much but still enough there that says "hey look, I'm not a child"

Cinn just needs a makeover, lose the glasses, get a new hair style. I've seen lots of people like her change and look like pornstars or models xD

#181: no, but I bet everyone here will eat you anyway ;) I won't, unless you're made of termites.

TELL ME I'M PRETTY! i'm actually made of gazelles.

Really? There's nothing wrong with the way Cinn looks now! For all you know, this picture may not even be an accurate portrayal of her. Perhaps she wears more makeup normally? Less makeup? Wears her hair differently? Perhaps she doesn't always wear glasses? I love how there's an entire thread dedicated to discussing whether poor Cinn's attractive or not. I'm sure this is all amusing to her, but really? Is there any reason this discussion needed to go on for so long, lol?

The_grumpy_bear 0

In all honesty, I think Cinn is rather cute. I don't see any reason to jump on her about her looks.

The_grumpy_bear 0

181 you're a waffle, of course you're pretty! :o I just wanna om nom you up!

Maybe that IS his real picture. Just sayin'

Even if Cinn wasn't particularly pretty (I think she's doing just fine in the looks department; this is hypothetical), at least she uses her brain. So many of the "drop-dead sexy" people on here are total morons. Sure, a hot dp will get you noticed online, and people may be quicker to agree with or talk to you if you're attractive. But IRL, most people worth knowing wouldn't give these idiots a second of their time after discovering the lack of meaningful brain function. Also, it's incredibly condescending to say someone "just needs a makeover." If you're confident about yourself and your looks— whether you're Angelina Jolie or Susan Boyle— you don't NEED anything. -.- Who cares what your "potential" for a certain look is if that's not your style?! I had LOTS of guy friends- even preppy ones- tell me I should "wear that look more often" when I dressed goth for a party; I don't, though, because it's not me.

sheribb 5

ur so pretty cinn and actually give decent opinions on FML so screw the haters !!!!

RachelTM 0

I'm cutting this discussion off. FML is NOT the place to be putting people down for their profile pictures. Please reread our comments policy.

#60 You get more right with every post. p.s. PIAET

Sounds like your boyfriend is full of excuses tell him to man up or you aren't returning the favor

why dump him? is it so wrong for the dude to just not want to munch where you piss and bleed? tell him to be honest at least so that you don't go through all the pain of waxing again

Peculiarchik, your comment might just've been stuck in the wrong place (it happens) but I don't think arhanes meant dump the bf, I thought she just meant don't go down on the bf until he does the same to her. But I do agree with your comment.

yep... it is in the wrong spot lol.. but some are saying to dump him.. and I don't get that. the fishy taco isn't for everyone

nothing wrong with going downtown on a lady, hair or no hair. bf needs to check in his man card...

I disagree. not liking to eat at the Y does not make him any less of a man. it may blow your mind to know that some women don't like playing the skin flute either

a man that doesn't want to go down... should not expect her to go down on him ever... it's just one of those things

IDK..I would rather go down then be gone down on...

Elenachka 0

I would be turned off too listening to the names you have for oral

I think the nicknames are better then the technical names..although i think the term 'eating out' is just nasty

I am a female that completely understands why a guy wouldn't want to go down on a girl -- mine won't do it for me; it's nothing against me and it's not like he won't please me in other ways, he just doesn't like to put his mouth on a ******. I mean, like peculiar chick said, we pee AND bleed out of the thing, and on top of this, there are all of those vaginal secretions that may or may not have an unpleasant odor/taste to the guy. Doesn't mean there's something wrong with you; it's the same as a girl not wanting a guy to cum in her mouth because of not liking the way semen tastes. Guys can't really avoid that because all of the pleasure points are in between the lips. If I were a dude, I wouldn't want to put my mouth down there, either. OP: Don't worry about it. If he satisfies you in other ways, who cares if he doesn't go down on you? Don't put yourself through a lot of trouble for something you know isn't going to happen.

The whole "who's gonna do what" issue is something every couple has to decide for themselves, because everyone has different opinions on it. But a ****** isn't any more inherently "icky" than a penis for 3 weeks out of the month. A better comparison than ****** to semen would be natural feminine lubrication to semen. This is one of those double-standard things; I suspect if OP was a guy whose gf wouldn't go down on him, there would be a lot more "dump her!" comments. Giving oral sex seems to be less optional in our society for females than it is for males.

I did include the vaginal secretions in that, lol, that was besides the other bodily functions that go on around a ******. I've noticed that, as well. I'm not exactly sure what my dude would do if I told him I wasn't going to give him oral anymore. Fortunately, I enjoy doing it for him, so it's not really a problem. But in general, it's expected for a girl to give a guy a *******. If she doesn't, it's like she's depriving him or something. But really, besides a handjob/sex...how else would you stimulate a penis? Even if you used toys, it's still basically an enhanced handjob. I can kinda see why guys prefer a ******* as their foreplay, cause there really isn't that much else to do with it, haha.

#218: Ahem. As a citizen of the world, I feel it necessary to address a few misconceptions you appear to have in regards to the topic of ***********. You suggest that smell is a factor in guys not wanting to go down on girls. If your nether regions smell bad to such an extent that another individual finds it unbearable to put their face in close proximity, you probably have an infection. I suggest visiting a doctor. If your boyfriend thinks going down on a girl means putting his mouth on her ******, he obviously has no idea what exactly he's supposed to be doing down there in the first place. The ********, not the ******, is meant to be the main focus of ***********. In addition to that, the ******** itself does not secrete anything. If the job was done properly, a minimal amount of secretions would find their way into the fellow's mouth. It would be more likely for him to get it on his chin. Furthermore, girls do not pee out of the ******. Girls pee out of the urethra, which is located between the ****** and the ********. Now that I have passed this information along, I bid you good day.

Alright, Mr/Ms. Technicality (I put it that way because your profile doesn't specify either way, I figured you were male, didn't want to be wrong.): 1) You might be right on the smell thing, but a lot of times taste goes along with smell. If the guy performing oral smells what he's tasting, and neither is pleasant to him, whether it's overpowering or not, well then he's not going to want to go down there anymore. Some girls' natural smells just aren't that pleasant, and it doesn't necessarily mean she has an infection. It could mean she ate something weird, or she's been out in the hot all day and has been sweating down there -- in which case, the guy shouldn't be going down there anyway, and the girl should shower prior to any type of sexual activity. 2) This is one of your technicality issues. No, the main focus isn't the ******. I didn't feel like being specific and detailed when I said this, forgive me for being a bit lazy. However, my guy is a germophobe and doesn't like to stick his face between a girl's legs. He's just weird about it, and I understand this -- thus I don't make him do it. There are things he'd like me to do that I won't do either, so it's fair in the end. It's not ruining our sex life in the slightest, anyway, so I don't feel it's that much of a problem. 3) *points to number 2* 4) I KNOW girls don't actually pee out of the ******. Once again, you're getting all technical with me. I know where the urethra is, and I know female anatomy in general because I AM ONE. I just didn't feel like being specific, again. Your mission to make me appear stupid? I believe it has failed. Good day.

May I point out that men often have unpleasant smells down there as well? In fact, since a lot of guys don't even trim their pubes, and the hair is what traps much of the odor-causing sweat and bacteria, we're sometimes left with that particular ball smell that I can only describe as a used gym sock stuffed with Swiss cheese. Hey, at least I like eating fish. Sushi is delicious. Let's not forget that having your air supply cut off by an object in your throat, trying to ignore your gag reflex, having your eyes and nose get watery, your jaw and lips getting sore, hand and wrist tiring out, and winding up with an aftertaste of bitter, chalky mucus aren't exactly things that most women wake up in the morning craving. But you know why I still go down on my boyfriends? Because I love doing something that gives them so much pleasure. That's the point of giving oral: making someone you care about feel good. It's more for your partner than for you. Some people actually get turned on by that prospect, maybe I'm crazy. My enthusiasm has almost always led to being told that I give the best oral that they've ever gotten. I still expect it in return, though. If my lady parts are too "icky" for him, despite keeping clean and shaved or close to it, or he just doesn't feel like putting forth the effort of doing something that isn't actively pleasuring him, then I'm not about to put up with being his personal ******* machine. Suck it up or don't get sucked.

Who is this directed towards? Me? Well, if it is or isn't, that is great for you. And I agree, giving oral isn't always the most pleasant thing in the world, and I guess I probably should expect it in return. However, it's never really been that big of a deal for me. As long as I'm getting some sort of foreplay in return that leaves me begging for his ****, then I don't really care how that's done. Everybody's sexual routine is different, and everybody's preferences are different. There are some girls that won't give oral at all for the same reason as my dude. It's a give and take situation, but not everybody's give and take is the same. Why does it matter HOW someone has sex as long as they're enjoying it?

Sweetheart... all of your points are ridiculously incorrect. Beyond the fact that you are ignoring basic anatomy of women, you;re also ignoring the basic anatomy of men! You don't pee out of your clit, but you DO pee out of your penis. If you can shove that thing down your throat, he can deal with your natural, hygienic ********. Also, it is offensive to women to suggest that you have something you are sexually obligated to do. You are no more obligated to give a ******* than he is to give head. You are not a sex object. Please repeat that to yourself quietly. And of course sex is a give-and-take thing. No one is obligated to do anything they don't want to do. What you DO need to do is give a legit explanation about what you are comfortable with instead of giving BULLSHIT reasons like the OP's boyfriend and, from the info you have divulged here, your boyfriend.

I'm not ignoring the basic anatomy of anyone -- I know what tube the pee comes out of, and I know where the end of the tube is. WTF do y'all still think I don't know about that, even after I obviously said I did. I'm not stupid. And I'm not saying anyone is obligated to do anything. I'm not saying women are obligated to give men ********; I'm not obligated to do anything for my guy. I never even said that I do not ENJOY giving him head. I DO. He does NOT. It's not like he doesn't do ANYTHING for me. He just won't do that. I'm not that concerned about it, and I don't see why y'all are. He does everything else BUT that. And frankly, as long as I'm getting off, and he gets off, too, I don't see why it matters how that happens. And I really don't see why you all care about the way my sex life works. And my question was: other than a handjob, *******, and full-on sex, how the hell else do you stimulate a man's penis? I give my guy ******** cause I don't like giving handjobs, and he enjoys the hell out of it. Why does it matter how I please him? Why does it matter how he pleases me? Please explain this to me because I am thoroughly confused.

Let me correct something here, because I did say that I agreed that it's not always the most pleasant thing in the world. But for the most part, with the exception of those nights that I'm just not into it, I DO actually enjoy giving.

I really don't see the problem with penguin's arguments here, guys. To each their own; if the guy doesn't want to do it, he doesn't want to do it, provided there's no bullshit excuse such as in OP's case. I don't see penguin's boyfriend's reasoning as a huge issue, rather I just see it as he may be slightly misinformed and may not like it regardless of the taste/smell. The same goes for women. As for becoming all technical, shit, since when did we all become perfect?! I'm sure every one of us has posted at least once (and that's an extreme understatement) something that was slightly inaccurate or totally wrong. Because penguin felt lazy and didn't feel like typing out ten more words to specify what it is she's talking about, which you all should have understood anyway, doesn't mean she's WRONG. Your collective arguments on here kind of tell me that you know damn well what she's talking about, and you're all just correcting for the sake of correcting. Who cares?

5t3ff1k4h, thank you. Finally, someone that is not going out of their way to attack me for no reason, lol. :D

Your comments make sense, I don't understand why no one else is able to see that.

So....this argument is now invalid, somewhat... Because he actually did it without me asking him to. Score for me! Bwhahaha.

luckyd880 12

Good for him finally stepping up and taking your feelings into consideration.

He just doesnt want to do it. Theres a difference between a child and a shaved adult, and he knows it. Women who think guys are pedo for liking hairless are retarded too.

#13: One, you shouldn't say someone is retarded as a form of insult. Two, I didn't realise that you liked to play spot the difference with little girls and shaved women. Personally, I don't know what a a little girl looks like down there as when I was a kid I didn't pay attention to down there.

If she is really skinny and flat I could see how it might be off putting

danabee09 0

maybe he doesn't want to go down at you at all.