By Doglover - 02/11/2017 14:00

Today, I went jogging. It was cold but I dressed lightly because I overheat when I exercise. Unfortunately, I locked myself out. My wife returned four hours later to find me spooning our dog in the doghouse to keep from freezing to death. FML
I agree, your life sucks 3 907
You deserved it 949

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I'm more concerned that the dog was kept outside if it was truly cold enough to freeze to death ...

I'm guessing you'll be hiding a spare key from now on? I'll never understand why people don't have a key they can access "just in case." My family used to keep one in the shed, in a toolbox. Hidden, but easy to get to if needed. And if it's that freaking cold, maybe take your dog inside too, yeah?

Comments

Lobby_Bee 17

Uhh, why didn't you just call your wife? If you didn't have your phone with you, couldn't you just go to the nearest diner and wait there with a warm cup of coffee?

Could it be because he usually doesn't run with his phone and wallet?

Looks like someone’s in the doghouse now. This time, figuratively.

I don't think you know what "figuratively" means...

I do. He was literally in the doghouse when his wife found him there, now he’s figuratively in the doghouse with her. Nice try, Professor.

Why would his wife be mad at him for accidentally locking himself out of his house and almost freezing to death?

Figuratively means metaphorically; a figure of speech. Literally means it actually happened. Literally is the word you were actually looking for, Richie. Don't get snappy because you were wrong.

Doos, did you read my reply? I clearly know the difference between literally and figuratively. I'm suggesting that both occurred here.

He very clearly means that he was in the doghouse literally (to keep warm) and is now in the doghouse figuratively (in trouble with his wife). Don't be condescending if you're too dumb to use your reading comprehension.

That has to be the lowest budget remake of that scene in The Empire Strikes Back where Luke cuts open a tauntaun to keep from freezing.

Wasn't it Han Solo who cut open the TaunTaun to put Luke inside?

Couldn't you stay at a neighbor's place or go to a nearby mall?

I'm guessing you'll be hiding a spare key from now on? I'll never understand why people don't have a key they can access "just in case." My family used to keep one in the shed, in a toolbox. Hidden, but easy to get to if needed. And if it's that freaking cold, maybe take your dog inside too, yeah?

You dont have a car you could have gotten into?

If they didn’t have a house key, why would they have a car key?

I'm more concerned that the dog was kept outside if it was truly cold enough to freeze to death ...

If it's cold to you, it's cold to your dog, unless they are specifically a cold weather breed. And even then that doesn't mean you should leave them out in the cold.

A lot of doghouses in colder climates have heat lamps inside.

That's not exactly outside anymore. And even then, the same places that do that are the ones where a heat lamp may as well be a match if the weather is bad.