Transportation: Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home,...

By nevergoingonabusagain - 30/05/2009 06:52 - Canada

Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 295

You deserved it 5 721

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Same thing different taste

Slippy

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 016

You deserved it 312

By Justme - 30/06/2016 18:20 - United States - Missoula

Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 134

You deserved it 1 488

By alice - 14/02/2011 01:18 - United Kingdom

I agree, your life sucks 30 342

You deserved it 3 554

By gringa_Peru - 18/04/2009 01:19 - Peru

Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170 285

You deserved it 9 878

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 918

You deserved it 3 420

Three's a crowd

By Anonymous - 13/08/2014 11:33 - Australia - Rooty Hill

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 699

You deserved it 4 023

By Chris - 22/10/2009 04:57 - Canada

Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 441

You deserved it 4 890

By Anonymous - 06/12/2013 18:15 - Norway - Ytre Arna

Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 219

You deserved it 3 014

By marlow - 15/01/2009 02:25 - Canada

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 880

You deserved it 2 725

Pervy

By nameless - 09/11/2010 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me. When I got off, he smiled and told me as the doors were closing, "The last twelve times was for fun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 125

You deserved it 2 924

ilikeboys 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 16:08

if you took a few steps back wouldn't it have been kinda hard to fall in his lap since he's a couple seats in front of you?

microfilms 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 16:09

how did you manage to turn yourself around to sit on his lap if you were facing him. it would have made more sense if you fell onto him face forward.

Comments

nuclear 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 2:43

#14 is right. this is soo lame and fake.

gurlgurlgurl 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 2:53

theres been like, a million FML's about 'going on a bus with no more room and a guy with a boner' its seriously getting old

rpfw69 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 3:45

That was me 38 Geary..2:15am..

theatre_fml 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 5:01

Let me enlighten those of you on your high horses who think this is not possible. If you actually read the FML, the OP describes what made them fall as 'something like a speed bump.' When you go over a speed bump, there are two bumps. It is possible that the first bump threw the OP forward again and, since they were already off balance, the second bump could have thrown the OP backwards into the man's lap. No magical turns involved. :)

fmllolfml 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 5:36

Couple steps back could also mean that she was facing him and took a few steps back while still facing him. This means she is still in a direct line with him and then possibly turned around to avert his gaze. Easy logic to follow. I bet that hurt too for the guy.