Health, Poopoo peepee and Accident: Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately,...

By pooplife - 30/11/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 272

You deserved it 4 972

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, Mr Whiskers

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 06:13 - Canada

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 893

You deserved it 5 989

HELP!

By SeatofIgnorance - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 763

You deserved it 5 464

By Anonymous - 17/03/2011 18:57 - United States

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 032

You deserved it 7 043

Humpty Dumpy

By traumatized - 12/04/2014 18:07 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 462

You deserved it 9 421

Bustin' my ass

By Anonymous - 07/10/2020 20:01

Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 446

You deserved it 202

Rememberance Day special

By Crappy circumstances - 11/11/2025 12:00

Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 89

By jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 108

You deserved it 454

By BrownDump - 14/05/2011 10:43 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 344

You deserved it 14 200

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 22:00

Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 187

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 1 426

lambda_fml 40

Monday 1 December 2014 9:57

Holy shit!

cakefete2 30

Monday 1 December 2014 13:40

That's extra funny given your profile pic. Btw, do you Noah guy who can fix OP's toilet seat?

Comments

Anonymous251989 1

Tuesday 2 December 2014 2:00

Shit happens OP

captainsmegma 12

Tuesday 2 December 2014 2:54

Come come now tell the truth. You farted and blew the seat off the bowl. Lay off the burritos baby.

tman1985 9

Saturday 6 December 2014 0:06

FUS-RO-DAH

zoso008 7

Tuesday 2 December 2014 3:56

If it slid off immediately how were you already pooping? Do you start pooping in mid sitting position? I call bullshit on that fabricated detail.

sonnyrosa 32

Tuesday 2 December 2014 5:27

OMG! OP, I'm so sorry, but I am laughing hysterically at this. Tears are pouring down my face as we speak, I'm unable to breathe... that kind of laughter. I hope you're not hurt. But holy shit, that is a funny mental picture.

SgtofHell 8

Tuesday 2 December 2014 12:17

Unlucky, but plain nasty shit.

Nina825 21

Tuesday 2 December 2014 12:24

Hehehehhe well look at the bright side.. Shower time?:p

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Tuesday 2 December 2014 13:33

Must have been a shitty time.

Iamnotfat 16

Thursday 4 December 2014 14:25

This actually made me laugh. "stunned and still pooping" you win

Fluckgworl 12

Friday 5 December 2014 19:57

This is the funniest saddest thing I've ever read.

squirrelspop 7

Saturday 20 December 2014 1:47

One of the screws on my toilet seat won't stay tight no matter what. If you sit on it "just right" it twists and you fear for your ever-pooping life. FML