Health Today, I discovered using handcuffs, now on day seven, has been... - FML

obake_neechan - 11/04/2016 07:47 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I discovered using handcuffs, now on day seven, has been the only solution to touching myself in my sleep. I also discovered that my dreams are significantly less fun right now. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was doing homework in the living room when my mom came in and started blasting music and cleaning. When I asked if she could turn it off so I could study, she bitched at me about "My house, my rules." She also has a rule that we can’t do homework in our rooms because of too many distractions. FML

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Today, I got a housekeeping warning from my landlord. After struggling with multiple serious health issues, I’ve also been dealing with a horrible case of depression as a result. When I tried to explain this to the manager, she decided to get the county involved and try to have me committed. FML

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Today, I woke up late to an urgent voicemail from my dad telling me he left me a present in my car. Excited, I went to investigate. I then saw that his "surprise" was fresh fish he had caught. I hate fish, and now my car stinks. FML

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Today, my boyfriend of 4 years, who I love with every fiber in my body, just told me that he's not attracted to me. Not in any way, shape, or form. FML

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Today, at work, an overweight man riding an electric cart started peeing all around the store. I had to clean it up. FML

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Today, I got dumped because I was on my period. Apparently he was pissed because I have one "like, every single month." FML

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