Kids: Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys...

By outsmartedbykids - 28/05/2014 16:28 - United States - Lake Mills

Today, I was at a buffet with my kids and husband. As my boys got up to get more food, I told them they'd better come back with something green on their plate. They both came back with mint ice cream and got a high-five from my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 645

You deserved it 30 874

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Same thing different taste

By screwedwoman27 - 19/06/2011 18:03 - United States

Today, I told my five year old daughter that no, she could not have ice cream for breakfast. She retaliated by pooping in the living room and smearing it on the walls. My in-laws, whom I've been trying to impress for ages, are visiting today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 054

You deserved it 7 532

By downlowtooslow - 12/06/2009 04:49 - United States

Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 669

You deserved it 6 874

Fussy eater

By germaphobe - 19/08/2021 20:59 - United States

Today, my kids and I went to have dinner with a coworker. After everyone ate, the kids went to play while I helped clear the dishes. To my horror, instead of individually wrapping the kids leftovers, she scraped all the uneaten food back into the main pots. I wanted to puke on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 164

Incoming!

By mvgirl - 22/10/2009 15:47 - United States

Today, while sitting with my son, an ice cream cone landed on my head from out of nowhere. I look up to see three children on the balcony above us yelling, "Look! We hit the fat lady!" They ran away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 095

You deserved it 5 601

Whoops

By smth - 06/07/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kids were thirsty, so I poured them both a cup of the green juice I'd found in a jug in their fridge. They downed it in a flash. It wasn't until later on after I'd poured myself a cup and taken a sip, I realized I had given them margarita mix. The kids are 4 and 2. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 367

You deserved it 58 734

By McChunky =( - 09/03/2009 08:25 - United States

Today, I was with my family at a buffet getting dessert. As I had my chocolate cake in hand, I grabbed an extra slice of cheesecake for my mom because I knew she would like a slice. Upon returning to my table, a couple walking behind me commented, "See, that's why Americans are so obese." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 069

You deserved it 9 184

By Anonymous - 30/09/2009 15:39 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my boss's kids. I brought chocolate for them and the youngest said he had never had chocolate and didn't want any. I told him he should always try new things and should eat it. He did. He's allergic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 420

You deserved it 42 074

By laughxlove - 23/08/2010 04:03 - United States

Today, I went to see my mother with my kids. Before, I had told my son to give her hugs and kisses and I would buy him candy. He did, but then he told her that I said that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 825

You deserved it 33 003

By Kathryn - 08/08/2011 23:58 - United States

Today, I went to my favorite all you can eat buffet. The cook tapped my shoulder and told me to stop eating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 448

You deserved it 15 866

Let him cook

By Max - 09/04/2014 18:32 - United States

Today, due to my wife saying I never cook and that we always order pizza, I spent a good hour preparing dinner. While serving it to my kids, they started complaining. My wife told them to shut up. When she took a bite, she looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Do you, you know, want to just order pizza?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 252

You deserved it 6 085

sirsquab 12

Wednesday 28 May 2014 23:39

Those kids are going places.

Rosebudx 32

Wednesday 28 May 2014 23:38

At least you've taught them to listen closely.

Comments

mylaugh 5

Friday 30 May 2014 1:10

Well played

YaddahYaddah 1

Friday 30 May 2014 3:51

In his defense, you said "Something Green" so he got something green.

anthadkins 5

Friday 30 May 2014 5:53

They only did what they were asked.

Byere 4

Friday 30 May 2014 9:50

You gotta be more specific... They're males, after all lol

syed121417 22

Saturday 31 May 2014 3:27

Well you said something green haha

NicoDiAngelo_fml 4

Saturday 31 May 2014 4:35

Smart kids

LittleKnownly 6

Saturday 31 May 2014 6:11

You kinda walked into that one.

Come_On_Really 6

Saturday 31 May 2014 7:20

That's just funny

jazzmin1997 16

Saturday 31 May 2014 14:33

Pretty funny tho :3

imamaniac 4

Saturday 31 May 2014 19:37

well you didnt specify that they needed to have green VEGGIES....

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