Intimacy: Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the...

By Silent - 03/12/2009 17:50 - United Kingdom

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 339

You deserved it 3 832

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Same thing different taste

Heartless swine

By Anonymous - 15/09/2015 05:56 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, I got up to get some water. When I stood up, I fell straight to the ground, my legs were so weak. As I fell, I hit my head on the end table and knocked myself unconscious. My boyfriend laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 047

You deserved it 4 396

By soawkward - 26/01/2012 19:09 - Canada

Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 054

You deserved it 5 140

Steamy

By Hotdamn - 21/03/2016 04:32 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 309

You deserved it 3 190

By Anonymous - 19/10/2014 01:23 - United States - South Salem

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 306

You deserved it 4 148

Oh hi!

By showerstupid - 04/04/2009 08:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 689

You deserved it 44 874

By iltdtsm - 15/08/2009 16:58 - Canada

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 237

You deserved it 3 268

Anemic performance

By too dumb for sex - 16/03/2019 22:00

Today, we tried to have sex for the first time but I got so excited my blood pressure shot up and I got a nosebleed that didn't fully stop for nearly 30 minutes. Then when we tried again she accidentally headbutted me. The new bleeding still hasn't stopped and I'm feeling very lightheaded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 298

You deserved it 262

Sick moves, dude

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 09:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 419

You deserved it 4 245

Dizzy

By Anonymous - 20/09/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I fainted in my bathroom, full on naked and sprawled out on my bathroom floor. When I came to, I was in pain from landing on my side and very disoriented. I sat up and could see my husband just roll over in bed and go to sleep. He didn’t even ask me if I was OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 82

Take it easy

By rapunzelsvaghair - 06/03/2023 06:00

Today, I flicked the bean so hard I fainted. I was in the shower and ended up coming to a few seconds later. I’m now too traumatized to use my vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 558

ScaryyMary 14

Thursday 3 December 2009 23:17

You must have a super-dick. Talk about thinking with the brain below the belt... Yeah, sorry, not funny. I seem to be made of fail today. :(

perdix 29

Thursday 3 December 2009 23:47

Nice cover-up! So, really, chief, what scares you more? **** or vaginas? I'm betting it's your girlfriend's hairy muff that brought you down.

Comments

movies12 0

Friday 4 December 2009 0:21

Wow!!

Jonr1138 6

Friday 4 December 2009 0:21

This is a good example of what FML should be. Very few fml's actually make me lol but this one did and probably always will.

BunnyDrastic 0

Friday 4 December 2009 0:29

damn dude was it awkward havin ur doctor explain that to u ha!

DeJahVu 0

Friday 4 December 2009 1:22

your gf must be quite the looker, or the complete opposite to make you faint.

DynamicDave 11

Friday 4 December 2009 1:25

Haha this reminds me of the seinfeld episode where jerry's penis and his brain play chess lol. You, sir, win for having such a hot girlfriend!

stupiddumbblonde 0

Friday 4 December 2009 3:47

Hahaahhaha this did make me Lol. :D Win.

redshortsx 0

Friday 4 December 2009 4:18

you don't even have enough blood to get it up and still be conscious? you are pathetic.

MayaTheBee_fml 10

Wednesday 10 July 2013 9:32

How is he pathetic? By saying that he's pathetic, you're saying that it's his fault his body was biologically made like that... *raises eyebrow*

axelkg 0

Friday 4 December 2009 5:07

no. this is such a lie. for that to happen, your penis would have to be atleast 21 inches long, which I guarantee it isn't.

MayaTheBee_fml 10

Wednesday 10 July 2013 9:34

Or he has anemia, you don't know

omghehehe 0

Friday 4 December 2009 6:05

Really?? If so, you must have a substantial piece of meat between your legs worthy of some **** king!! But then again, I kind of have a hard believing this was your 1st erection ever. Hmmm... Care to elaborate? :)