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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went to the beach. After applying sunscreen liberally and doing my best to stay out of the sun, I came home with the worst sunburn I have ever had. I almost needed to go to the hospital. I am officially too pale to be allowed outside in summer. FML

#14518373
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27568) - you deserved it (4071)

On 01/09/2011 at 6:11am - health - by whitey (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I'm getting over strep throat. The antibiotics they gave me make me have diarrhea unless I eat yogurt in between each pill. That wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't lactose-intolerant. Yogurt gives me really bad gas. So I have to choose between painful gas or diarrhea. FML

Today, I went to the OBGYN for my annual, and noticed they now supplied babywipes. After 3 seconds of "cleaning", the intense burning started. Turns out they were antibacterial bleach wipes. FML

#14502012
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10264) - you deserved it (30620)

On 01/07/2011 at 10:09pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that every time I hear running water, I have less than a minute to find a toilet or I'll pee my pants. FML

#14498607
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30082) - you deserved it (3901)

On 01/07/2011 at 4:46pm - health - by walnutbladder (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I burned myself while cooking, so I asked my mom to get the burn cream while I waited in the kitchen. While I was waiting, I absentmindedly set my hand on the hot stove, earning myself a second burn. FML

#14497096
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8702) - you deserved it (40899)

On 01/07/2011 at 1:14pm - health - by ouchieouch (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML

#14492583
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21176) - you deserved it (24753)

On 01/07/2011 at 12:46am - health - by biscuit (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I fell and got a nasty cut above my right eye. The doctor in the ER sealed the wound with surgical glue. He also glued his glove to my eyebrow, and let glue run onto my eyelid. Not only do I have a scar and medical bill, I now have no eyebrow or eyelashes on my right eye. FML

#14488481
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32990) - you deserved it (2343)

On 01/06/2011 at 7:26pm - health - by Dante -

Today, I had a plaster cast removed from my arm. After telling the nurse it felt like the saw was cutting my skin, she tells me there is no way that it could touch my skin and that I was being paranoid. She cracked open the cast. Burns, blisters and bleeding skin were revealed. FML

#14484091
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46352) - you deserved it (2727)

On 01/06/2011 at 9:54am - health - by omfgitburns (man) -

Today, I had a panic attack at 2am because someone decided to throw a snowball at my window. FML

#14482649
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23987) - you deserved it (6533)

On 01/06/2011 at 3:58am - health - by nuerrotticc -

Today, I was at the doctor's getting some skin scraped off the bottom of my foot for some tests. As soon as the doctor grabbed my foot, it tickled and I accidentally kicked him in the face. During this, the blade sliced my foot open. FML

#14482213
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30327) - you deserved it (9921)

On 01/06/2011 at 2:35am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, while walking on the sidewalk with my boyfriend, I slipped and fell. Not only did he not help me get up or ask if I was okay, he got mad at me for embarrassing him in public. FML

#14461998
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33499) - you deserved it (4528)

On 01/04/2011 at 10:47am - health - by clumsy -

Today, I discovered after four hours of vomiting that it is very much possible to vomit so hard you can't help but shit in your trousers. My boyfriend is currently staying over, too. FML

#14458988
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28571) - you deserved it (2829)

On 01/04/2011 at 2:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend told me there was a tick on my shoulder and that he would remove it so I shouldn't worry. After about a half hour, lots of blood, and a ton of pain, he told me it was just a mole. FML

#14451533
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34033) - you deserved it (4845)

On 01/03/2011 at 2:50pm - health - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)



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