Today, I went to the orthodontist. The lady took a break and went to use the restroom. Apparently she didn't bother to take her gloves off, and they smelled like straight up pee. She had her hands in my mouth for over an hour. FML

by Bob / 11/22/2011 at 1:06pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I got hit in the face at a dodge-ball tournament. My entire mouth was bloody. The sad thing is, I wasn't even playing. FML

by haileyjunkin / 11/22/2011 at 12:53pm / Health

Today, my mom read my diary. Then she frantically booked me an appointment with a psychiatrist. FML

by ughh / 11/22/2011 at 8:22am / United States / Health

Today, I found out that what I thought could be a life-threatening issue causing me chest pains was only because I over-obsessed about it. Now not only do I have social anxiety, but I get so anxious I can create fake illnesses. FML

by daybyday / 11/22/2011 at 3:08am / Australia / Health

Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML

by bad karma / 11/21/2011 at 9:34am / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, the main topic for my sister and her friends in the car was how many ways they could think of to kill me. They came up with 137. I have to spend a week with these people. FML

by xattackattackx / 11/18/2011 at 4:01am / United States (Hawaii) / Health

Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML

by OUCH. / 11/17/2011 at 4:27pm / United States / Health

Today, after years of training myself to crave healthier foods in order to lose weight, I found out that some of my favorite health-foods actually aggravate my hypothyroidism, and indirectly reduce my metabolism. Broccoli and soybeans are making me fat. FML

by healthfoodshmealthfood / 11/17/2011 at 9:34am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I learned how hard it is to remove peanut butter from your own eye. FML

by ray / 11/17/2011 at 6:22am / United States / Health

Today, I moved to California. Too bad the rest of my belongings didn't. FML

by tomoxishigaki / 11/16/2011 at 8:32pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I had an anxiety attack because I thought I'd lost my anxiety medication. It ended up being on the shelf right where I left it. FML

by anxiety / 11/16/2011 at 12:11am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, and all day, I was forced to listen to one of the kids in my apartment building play their recorder loudly and horribly. She started over whenever she missed a note. I was sick, was getting a migraine from it, and couldn't ask her to stop without her mom yelling at me. FML

by mintypoison / 11/13/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, only after I almost knocked myself out cold with the shampoo bottle, did I finally get some out. FML

by Courtney / 11/12/2011 at 4:13pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health