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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, after staying in bed all day for a week from sickness, I get up to tell my mom I have terrible back pain and feel extremely dizzy. After curling up on the chair next to her, not being able to keep my head up for too long, she simply stares at me and says, "Can I finish my dinner now?" FML

#13720258
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23237) - you deserved it (5042)

On 11/04/2010 at 10:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to move back in with my dad and brother. After getting settled, I had to shower. I got everything ready and when I got in, it smelled strongly of pee. The stink was so intense I could barely breathe. Cleaning doesn't even help. I'm stuck here for at least a month. I hate living with men. FML

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic-Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up... out my left nostril. FML

#13652209
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33532) - you deserved it (5690)

On 10/30/2010 at 5:28pm - health - by DeepTaccer (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML

#13641509
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43041) - you deserved it (4788)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I decided to put on my Halloween make-up to be sure that I could and that it would look nice. I was satisfied with my results, and went to wash it off. Everything came off fine, except for the eye liner and eye shadow. It's bright purple. I'm a man. Halloween isn't until Sunday. FML

#13615434
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12934) - you deserved it (27420)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took a shower and right after I fell asleep on my bed wrapped in my towel. I awoke to find my dad slapping me in the face. He thought I had fainted because I'm a diabetic. FML

#13610970
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24735) - you deserved it (5097)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:07am - health - by haleyfml - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my dandruff issue was so horrible, that even my eyebrows have dandruff. FML

#13610452
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25777) - you deserved it (7318)

On 10/27/2010 at 1:24am - health - by ew - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to the dentist. I had to get a tooth removed. In the middle of the procedure, the power went out. I had to sit there for an hour to wait for it to come back on. The anesthetic wore off before he started working on me again. FML

#13603751
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29998) - you deserved it (2315)

On 10/26/2010 at 4:34pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while working at a hospital, I told a patient to smile for the camera when taking an xray. His response was, "I have Bell's Palsy and haven't smiled in 5 years." FML

#13601804
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24306) - you deserved it (7133)

On 10/26/2010 at 12:50pm - health - by oaksac191 - United States (New York)

Today, I watched a grizzled, old gas station attendant with a stain on her blouse use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

#13559030
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32940) - you deserved it (2674)

On 10/23/2010 at 4:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking down my very steep basement stairs when I fell and rolled all the way down but luckily I didn't hurt anything. While walking back up around the very last stair, my cat jumped out on me, causing me to roll all the way back down. FML

#13536174
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27336) - you deserved it (3703)

On 10/21/2010 at 10:48am - health - by catattack78 (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was shaving my left armpit when I cut myself badly. I wondered whether or not it would be safe to shave my right armpit, then reasoned that it couldn’t possibly happen twice. It did. FML

#13534827
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15281) - you deserved it (25343)

On 10/21/2010 at 6:57am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that I have a gluten allergy. What this basically means is that I can't eat anything with wheat in it; bread, pasta, cake, you name it. I am Italian, this basically limits me from eating any of the awesome food my family makes almost every night. Here I come plain rice. FML

#13531568
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35177) - you deserved it (2987)

On 10/20/2010 at 11:12pm - health - by allergic - Sent from mobile version



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