Today, after breaking down in front of my therapist over some really sensitive issues, she decided to also break down. Not about my story but about her own life. I'm not being paid to comfort and console my therapist. FML

by ryuken23 / 02/14/2012 at 2:16pm / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Health

Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

by loveinanelevator / 02/13/2012 at 7:03am / Health

Today, I cracked a rib coughing. FML

by anonymous / 02/13/2012 at 6:32am / United States / Health

Today, I noticed that I have gained enough weight to give me back boobs. FML

by Anonymous / 02/10/2012 at 11:12am / United States / Health

Today, I took my first shower in weeks after having had spinal surgery. My sister flushed a toilet. I couldn't reach the nozzle or my cane to get off the shower bench, and all I could do was sit there as scalding hot water sprayed all over me. FML

by Ouchies / 02/09/2012 at 12:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, my social anxiety got so bad, I nearly had a panic attack when too many people joined my World of Warcraft party. FML

by SocialAnxietyNightmare / 02/09/2012 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, I was at a Buddhist shrine and wanted to light a candle for my friend who's having a rough time, when I got stung by a bee. I spent the next hour with a swollen shoulder. How does karma work again? FML

by thairsha / 02/09/2012 at 6:05am / Japan / Health

Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML

by screwed / 02/07/2012 at 8:40pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, I sneezed after watching a commercial involving dust. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2012 at 7:04am / United States / Health

Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML

by anonymous / 02/07/2012 at 4:27am / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML

by Marc / 02/06/2012 at 4:43pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, my downstairs neighbor died. I knew because the smell wafted up to my apartment. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2012 at 5:38am / United States / Health

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

by MahSquito / 02/05/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Health