Today, I fell and fractured my tailbone. I just healed from my last tailbone fracture 4 weeks ago. FML

by pinklatina / 12/09/2016 at 3:01pm / Canada / Health

Today, I went to the ER for an asthma attack. I left with a UTI and an elevated heart rate. FML

by ryuuchild / 12/08/2016 at 7:07pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my fiancé completely missed the birth of our first child because he had started watching a new series on Netflix and really wanted to know how it ended. By the time he made it to the hospital our daughter was already 7 hours old. FML

by Alexandra / 12/08/2016 at 3:00pm / United Kingdom (Kirklees) / Health

Today, in an effort to get active, I swam some laps at my school pool. Afterwards, I noticed that someone had broken into the locker I was using. Thankfully nothing was stolen except for my shoes and socks. I had a full day of classes to go to, barefoot, in December and an hour bus ride home. FML

Today, it's the 11th day I've been in the hospital due to my kidneys. My mother has come in every day since to make me feel bad about missing Thanksgiving. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2016 at 12:09pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, my family held an intervention and told me I needed to lose weight. It probably would've had more impact if they hadn't done this over video chat while stuffing their faces at an all-you-can-eat buffet. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2016 at 5:14pm / Health

Today, my reflexes kicked in when I saw a hot glue gun falling. FML

by ghostninja4593 / 12/01/2016 at 10:48pm / United States (Iowa) / Health

Today, I wrote a bad review for a pizza place after their pizza gave me food poisoning. Now, they won't stop calling me, begging me to take my review down in exchange for free pizza. I have tried to tell them that I wouldn't eat their pizza again even if I got paid to do so, but they won't listen. FML

by KereKris / 12/01/2016 at 2:18pm / Health

Today, I finally went to the doctor for a condition I've had all my life. Turns out it was easily cured with a simple pill. I peed in my pants everyday for 27 years for nothing. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2016 at 5:48am / Health

Today, I discovered that when my doctor said my new medication "may cause sensitivity to sunlight" what he meant was "sit in total darkness during the day or your skin will feel like its burning off." FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2016 at 8:48pm / Health

Today, safety inspectors have deemed our basement unfit to serve as a bedroom due to a fire hazard. Our bed is now in the living room. FML

Today, my roommates told me about all the stupid and embarrassing things I did last night, none of which I remember. Drunk out of my mind? No, I just tried a new sleeping pill after weeks of insomnia. I still barely slept. FML

by Sleepless Dreams / 11/28/2016 at 11:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was feeling queasy from the flu so I made some soup to see if it would settle my stomach. It didn't, but at least the giant burn I got on my thigh when the soup spilled hurts enough to distract from the nausea. FML

by Lepisma / 11/27/2016 at 2:22am / United States (Texas) / Health