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Today, my 4 year old's heavily pregnant teacher pulled me aside and asked me to talk to my son about "boundaries". Apparently, he asked her if she was going to "boobie feed" him and listed a few reasons why she should and why formula is bad, in front of the entire class. FML

Today, I found out why my coworkers never invite me anywhere. Apparently, I "made a face" when one of them used the N-word, and it makes them uncomfortable to be around me. FML

#21512272
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19238) - you deserved it (1958)

On 01/06/2016 at 8:55pm - work - by seeking new employment (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my mom can't wait until I turn 18, so she can kick me out and turn my room into a huge closet for all her clothes. FML

#21512120
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20730) - you deserved it (1888)

On 01/06/2016 at 1:01pm - misc - by makdra (woman) -

Today, a 65-ish year-old man told me that he's married and not supposed to look at other women, but that I tempt him. All while sitting next to his wife, who then told me I was going to hell. FML

#21511989
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22622) - you deserved it (1511)

On 01/05/2016 at 11:56pm - work - by Nicky_ham (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I poured boiling water over my instant noodles. A freshly boiled cockroach also rolled out onto my noodles. FML

#21511938
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (2010)

On 01/05/2016 at 10:05pm - misc - by delicious (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I tried asking a guy I like on a date. He turned me down, saying that I "seem like a nice person and all", but after seeing those reality shows on truTV, he "would rather not date a Russian. No offense, though." FML

#21511782
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20413) - you deserved it (1423)

On 01/05/2016 at 1:49pm - love - by vanilla_blossom (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the button on my husband's pants popped for the 4th time. I already used the strongest thread and buttons. He's obviously put on some weight around the stomach, but he won't listen to reason and still blames me for my sewing, which is making his pants "turn against him". FML

#21511680
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20561) - you deserved it (1616)

On 01/05/2016 at 3:43am - misc - by Robyn (woman) - Belgium (Limburg)

Today, one of my customers told me he was going to kill himself when I explained to him that I wasn't going to be able to deliver him the gallon of milk he wanted. I work in a pharmacy, dispensing medication. FML

#21511580
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19381) - you deserved it (1168)

On 01/04/2016 at 10:27pm - work - by HeatherFeatherB (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a job interview where I was asked, "Who is your best friend?" I replied truthfully, "My cat", only to then be asked what my cat would describe as my best qualities, which didn't go far beyond, "Remembering to feed him". They weren't impressed. FML

#21511573
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18296) - you deserved it (5077)

On 01/04/2016 at 10:08pm - work - by Emma (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my husband and I were getting frisky. All was going well until I decided to go down on him, causing him to freak out, thinking I was going for his butt, ending the night with a black eye from being knee'd in the face. FML

#21511250
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21979) - you deserved it (2268)

On 01/04/2016 at 1:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my ex-boyfriend admitted the reason he broke up with me was because he cheated and felt awful about it. The girl is now pregnant, but he swears it isn't his. Guess we'll find out in a few months if my daughter has a sibling. FML

#21511205
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21792) - you deserved it (2082)

On 01/03/2016 at 11:57pm - intimacy - by loko0909 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me I sound like a squeaky toy during sex, and asked if I could get it under control because it creeps him out. FML

#21510905
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20277) - you deserved it (3722)

On 01/03/2016 at 4:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, after driving for four hours to visit my best friend for the New Years break, she still hasn't finished up her skype conversation and left her room to greet me. She knows I'm here. I've spent the last hours watching youtube videos with her cat. FML

#21510596
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20505) - you deserved it (1653)

On 01/02/2016 at 11:57am - misc - by Anonameow (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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