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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a Taylor Swift concert. At the concert they put up a sign that said "Scream if you love country boys." My boyfriend took one look at it and started screaming. FML

#1971558
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55323) - you deserved it (11547)

On 05/16/2009 at 3:52am - love - by TayTay (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was walking towards my friends at the bus stop, a man came up to me and asked me out. This was the first time I'd be asked out in months. I accepted. When I reached my friends they looked at me then asked, "Why were you talking to that homeless guy?". FML

#1970945
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33926) - you deserved it (17393)

On 05/15/2009 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went out on a first date with a cute guy. Turns out we won't be going on a date again because I didn't know the difference between "Star Wars" and "Star Trek." FML

#1968718
453 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29420) - you deserved it (66806)

On 05/15/2009 at 5:17pm - love - by not4geeks (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML

#1964368
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38252) - you deserved it (4439)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:49pm - intimacy - by dammitall (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting next to this really cute guy in choir class. Trying to make conversation, I asked him what his favorite song was. He replied "Leave Me Alone". I asked him who it was by and he said, "It's not a song, I just want you to leave me alone". FML

#1963959
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31483) - you deserved it (8699)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by jayden5 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, a cab driver had to sign me out of the emergency room because I didn't know who else to call. FML

#1962325
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53165) - you deserved it (4161)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:35pm - health - by ccc (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend that I could never marry him because he's a Yankees fan. He told me he could never marry me because he couldn't see himself having a terrible love life for the rest of his life. He was serious. FML

#1961267
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42464) - you deserved it (12826)

On 05/15/2009 at 11:18am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, in my art class we had to paint a nude portrait of a fat, old woman. About halfway through the piece, and while painting her fat rolls, I realized she was the only person other than myself I had ever seen naked. FML

#1961143
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41416) - you deserved it (7434)

On 05/15/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by artclasstrauma (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a job interview at a local business with the owner who was man, and the manager who was a woman. I thought I did pretty well because I heard the manager whisper so, as I was walking out. Then I heard the owner whisper "no fat chicks." FML

#1958441
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41829) - you deserved it (6519)

On 05/15/2009 at 7:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the midnight premiere of Angels and Demons. A hobo wandered into the theater and sat down behind me. I paid $10 to spend two and a half hours listening to a crazy man talk to himself and kick my chair while he loudly masturbated. FML

#1957244
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55761) - you deserved it (9247)

On 05/15/2009 at 3:08am - intimacy - by Langdon (woman) - United States

Today, I realised that my glade plug-in air freshner lasts longer than any of my relationships have. FML

#1956453
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50367) - you deserved it (9840)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:14am - love - by heartless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML

#1955875
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24276) - you deserved it (43155)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by badboyfriends (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a store to buy pants for a new job. A really hot guy helped me get a pair down from a high shelf so I could try them on. He had flirted with me so I hurried in the fitting room so I could go talk to him. Note to self: Check to see if you have pants on after trying on clothes. FML

#1953704
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11782) - you deserved it (51299)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:32am - misc - by sweet92 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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