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Today, I was babysitting. The kids were thirsty, so I poured them both a cup of the green juice I'd found in a jug in thier fridge. They downed it in a flash. It wasn't until later on after I'd poured myself a cup and taken a sip, I realized I had given them margarita mix. The kids r 4 and 2. FML

#3515386
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15352) - you deserved it (54027)

On 07/05/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by smth (woman) - United States (Utah)

today I went to the drug store to pick up some Monistat fir a yeast infection . As I was leaving the store, the security alarm went off . The attractive security guard asked to see my receipt, smiled, told me I looked nice, so I handed him the receipt . His face then abruptly changed to a look of disgust . mega FML

#3511573
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39807) - you deserved it (4033)

On 07/05/2009 at 8:06pm - health - by yeasty (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to ba go to tha ER aftar I fall on a raka . Aftar having stichas puttad in, my Mom wantad ma to go to tha stora with har . My friand saw ma at tha stora and thought it would ba funny to rip off tha band aid cuz sha thought I was hiding a zit . Sha rippad out my stitchas . FML

#3510795
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60406) - you deserved it (2486)

On 07/05/2009 at 7:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found one of those online color blindness tests where you have to distinguish a colord number from the pattern. Not being able to, I spent hundreds of dollars on medical tests to discover that the pattern online was a joke.

#3509124
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12021) - you deserved it (64830)

On 07/05/2009 at 5:49pm - misc - by colorblind (woman) - United States (California)

Today... I Got A Call From Mah Parents That They Have Decided To Get A Divorce. My Brothers And I Just Shelled Out $5...000 Each And Spent Months Planning Their 50th Anniversary Party That Was Supposed To Be Next Month. Mega FML

#3507672
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51203) - you deserved it (2710)

On 07/05/2009 at 4:12pm - love - by Annabelle (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today... I was fired from my volunteer job. Why? Because they said I was working so hard and doing such a good job that I was making the real staff look bad. mega FML

today was my wedding day. Right before I walked down the aisle in my gorgeoushite dress the womanho did my makeup saw a blemish. She went to squirt concealer on her finger an squirted the orange concealer all over my dress. FML

#3503647
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56366) - you deserved it (3016)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:48pm - love - by squirt (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

2day I met my biological mother fir the first time. I also found out from her husband that she has her looool nipple an nether region pierced. FML

#3497280
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39305) - you deserved it (3455)

On 07/05/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by Disgusted (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today , it was my boyfriend an my six-month anniversary . I've really fallen in love with him , an I know he loves me the same . So I got him a really nice gift , a watch he's had his eye on for as long as I've known him . It was expensive . What does he get me? A condom . Three actually . FML

#3495004
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43431) - you deserved it (8756)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, My Boss Told Ma Ha Is A Suparharo. Ha Has Writtan Countlass Comics About His Crusadas And Advanturas. I Maka Fifty Dollars An Hour Lass Than Him. FML

#3494864
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37952) - you deserved it (3970)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:53am - money - by iloveZELOS (woman) - United States

TODAY , I WAS ON A TRAINEN AN OLD MAN STANDING NEXT TO ME VERY OBVIOUSLY CECKD ME OUT , CAUGT MA EYE , AND WINKD. HE SPENT TE NEXT FIVE MINUTE RUBBING IS PENIS AGAINST MA LEG. WEN I TURND TO TELL IM OFF , TE TRAIN LURCD , AND TE OLD MAN FELL FACE FIRST INTO MA BREASTS. REAL FML

#3493845
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49242) - you deserved it (6222)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by bridezilla (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today... my friend told me that she gave my number to a guy I've liked 4 ahile. I askedhy an she just said ( He's just going to have to tell you himself. ) I got hopeful an really nervous. A few hours later he calls. Turns out... he's called to try an get a date with my gay friend. FML

#3491271
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35741) - you deserved it (2994)

On 07/04/2009 at 10:40pm - love - by Single4Life (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today My Drunk Boyfriend Thought It Would Be A Good Idea To Light A Firework In The Back Seat Of My Car While We Were Driving Down The Interstate. FML

#3486397
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40351) - you deserved it (6073)

On 07/04/2009 at 6:48pm - misc - by litup (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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