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Man or woman?

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

#21430188
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24662) - you deserved it (2840)

On 06/22/2015 at 3:55pm - love - by Partners (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML

#21430016
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28538) - you deserved it (3536)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:35am - work - by Iamsosorry (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, while swimming under water, my 80-pound lab thought I was drowning and tried to "rescue" me by jumping in after me, wrapping his front legs around my neck, and standing on my chest. FML

#21429802
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21514) - you deserved it (1737)

On 06/21/2015 at 10:16pm - animals - by Angel (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend murmured his sister's name during sex. Before you say he was thinking of someone else with the same name, I've only ever met one person in our town called Nohemi. FML

#21429316
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26641) - you deserved it (1642)

On 06/21/2015 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I realized I'm pregnant by a man who won't even accept my Facebook friend request. FML

#21429134
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22028) - you deserved it (17568)

On 06/20/2015 at 4:54pm - misc - by happycow122 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I caught my mother-in-law trying to plant a GPS tracker on my car. FML

#21428876
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26219) - you deserved it (1769)

On 06/20/2015 at 1:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I decided to do naked yoga in my lounge room, as I always do. Later, I found a note on my front door saying "Keep doing what you're doing". FML

#21428771
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24809) - you deserved it (8126)

On 06/19/2015 at 9:06pm - misc - by jenpearl (woman) - Australia

Today, I woke up to the sound of 4 gunshots from downstairs. I screamed, hid under the bed in tears and called the cops. Turned out my boyfriend hadn't been murdered by a burglar like I thought - he'd found a tarantula in our living room and decided to feed it a face full of lead. FML

#21428622
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26816) - you deserved it (3146)

On 06/19/2015 at 3:00pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the restaurant I recently got a job at, to take the introductory three hour training course. Afterwards, I was told I wasn't hired after all. Why? The girl I was replacing suddenly decided she didn't want to move away and quit after all. FML

Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML

#21428077
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25862) - you deserved it (1965)

On 06/18/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, my sister started a full-time job with a good pay despite having no prior work experience and being a college freshman. Meanwhile, I've graduated with two degrees, have been working two jobs for the last five years, and still can't get a full-time position anywhere. FML

#21427853
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27734) - you deserved it (2765)

On 06/17/2015 at 11:50pm - work - by Realworldred (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm actually starting to miss my former heroin addict neighbor because of how mellow he was compared to my new neighbors. FML

#21427797
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25943) - you deserved it (2074)

On 06/17/2015 at 10:07pm - money - by Rusty (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

#21427606
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29651) - you deserved it (8526)

On 06/17/2015 at 2:09pm - kids - by RecentCollegeGrad (woman) -



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