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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I now know what it feels like to violently sneeze while a nurse still has a needle in your arm. FML

#21525526
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (2269) - you deserved it (144)

On 02/12/2016 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, a teacher told me in all seriousness that she believes my son, who has severe learning difficulties, is likely demonically possessed. I'm sorry, but what century are we living in? Now I have to get him moved to another school so he doesn't have to be in the care of this nutjob. FML

#21525510
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (2439) - you deserved it (160)

On 02/12/2016 at 1:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I experienced one of those moments in life you never forget. I walked into a homeless man masturbating in a parking garage stairwell. FML

#21525394
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12283) - you deserved it (843)

On 02/12/2016 at 4:00am - intimacy - by scarredforlife (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I found out my insurance company denied my claim because they had me marked down as "male" and yet also pregnant. I now have to prove to them that I'm actually a woman. FML

#21525162
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16270) - you deserved it (976)

On 02/11/2016 at 1:12pm - health - by notaman (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I greeted my boss with, "Looking good, did you lose weight?" He responded that no, he'd just purchased larger pants. FML

#21525094
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15550) - you deserved it (3000)

On 02/11/2016 at 7:24am - work - by candy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after months of daily migraines and doctor's visits, I've now been told that my "temporary" hearing loss has nothing to do with my migraines, nor is it temporary at all. FML

#21524813
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18325) - you deserved it (1091)

On 02/10/2016 at 12:49pm - health - by make america date again (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my aunt informed me that my dad thinks my boyfriend is a loser deadbeat because he hasn't proposed to me after two years of dating and co-habitation. He hasn't asked because I already made it very clear I have no interest in marriage. FML

#21524771
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17240) - you deserved it (3833)

On 02/10/2016 at 10:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I worked from home to actually be able to concentrate and make a presentation about my project. My boss then sends me a long email about how he wants us to work in the office, and how important it is for team building, giving me feelings of guilt for actually getting some work done. FML

#21524722
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15527) - you deserved it (1605)

On 02/10/2016 at 6:57am - work - by PhD student (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I learnt what my boss meant when he said he would 'get his revenge on me' for winning a bet. I have to clean all the rooms that currently have a couple staying in it on February 15th. I don't want to work in a hotel anymore. FML

#21524475
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16531) - you deserved it (1362)

On 02/09/2016 at 4:53pm - work - by Hello condoms and lube (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I visited my son at his university accommodations and noticed he's clearly never cleaned it since he moved in two years ago. I tried cleaning it myself, but gave up entirely when I found what looked like mushrooms growing out of an old takeout container. FML

#21524464
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17424) - you deserved it (1981)

On 02/09/2016 at 4:35pm - kids - by Pauline (woman) - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a romantic dinner, since we can't see each other this Valentine's Day. Halfway through, my aunt called, telling me my grandma had died. I had to leave because I was crying so much, leaving my girlfriend with a very pricey bill. FML

#21524337
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20187) - you deserved it (3772)

On 02/09/2016 at 6:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I tutored a third grade girl after school. She was squirming so much I thought she had to go to the bathroom. Turns out, she was just masturbating on the corner of a school chair. FML

Today, for the seventh weekend in a row, I left my weekly visit with my long-distance boyfriend unsatisfied. Seems he enjoys getting shit-faced drunk more than he enjoys getting a boner. FML

#21523668
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18425) - you deserved it (2985)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by noO (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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