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Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my nieghbor begging me to please shut the hell up. mega FML

#4582506
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15144) - you deserved it (39289)

On 08/16/2009 at 9:00pm - misc - by Ricky (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her.

#4574797
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70424) - you deserved it (10578)

On 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, mah girlfriend named mah penis "little baby carrot." FML

#4572721
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59071) - you deserved it (10172)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I woke up wit girl laying next to me in bed. Wen se woke up we started to get ot an eavy but all of a looool sudden our cat ops on te bed. I guess te cat was more important cause girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by anoter pussy. FML

#4572543
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54289) - you deserved it (8079)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today.. . I was driving on the freeway and there was a dead animal (I think a cat) in the road . The car in front of me decidd to merge over . It kickd up part of the dead animal and sent it flying through mah open window . I think I got hit in the face with a piece of foot . FML

#4571897
103 comments

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter 4 this grl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admrer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxiou to finish the letter that I ended up writing mah name at the bottom. FML

#4563913
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10613) - you deserved it (48623)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:17am - love - by footyfallout (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today... I'm having my housewarming party and had prepard food... drink and games 4 all the 19 confirmd guests on Facebook. I waitd till 11 but nobody showd up. I checkd Facebook again and realizd I had accidentally put tomorrow as the party date. I have to work the whole day tomorrow. FML

#4562871
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10938) - you deserved it (46636)

On 08/16/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by revalc (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Yesterday, I was planning on asking out a grl I've been really close to for a few monts now!! I was wit er wen I got a forward text from my friend!! It was from te grl an it said "noooo tell im not to ask me out I don't lyk im." I got rejected via forward text before I told er ow I felt!! FML

#4562834
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37682) - you deserved it (2835)

On 08/16/2009 at 12:33am - love - by Tgreject (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today I was working at a shoe store and was helping a dude try on shoes. He looked like trouble and I wanted to finish with him. When he finally picked his shoes he abruptly stood up and ran out of the store with the shoes on. The cost of them was deducted from mah salary. $240. FML

#4556856
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45605) - you deserved it (3597)

On 08/15/2009 at 8:49pm - money - by smallpaycheck (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I invitad avaryona to a gig I'm playing at a bar. Thay closad it down just 4 mahan I told tham how many paopla wara attanding, and I spant all day satting it up. Turns out nobody showad up basidas mah mom, mah dad, and 2 of mah cousins. I still had to play 7 songs in front of tham. FML

#4546975
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43105) - you deserved it (6202)

On 08/15/2009 at 11:02am - misc - by playinmyguitar (man) - United States (Kentucky)

TODAY, AFTER HAVING A FEW BEERS AT A BAR, I GAVE MAH TICKET TO THE VALET TO GET MAH CAR. I TIPPD THE MAN $2 AND HE GAVE ME A HUGE SMILE AND THANKD ME A LOT AS I LEFT. I THOUGHT THE GUY WAS JUST REALLY APPRECIATIVE FOR THOSE $2 UNTIL I GOT HOME AND SAW ONE OF THE $100 BILLS IN MAH WALLET WAS GONE. FML

#4546368
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12609) - you deserved it (53550)

On 08/15/2009 at 9:56am - money - by whooops (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slippd on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML

#4543723
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51796) - you deserved it (9837)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:51am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (Michigan)

TODAY , ON MY WEDDING DAY , WHEN THEY SAID ( YOU MAY KISS THE BRIDE ) , I SWUNG MY WIFE OVER IN THE ROMANTIC FASHION AND WENT IN FIR THE KISS. UNFORTUNATELY MY HANDS WERE SWEATY AS I WAS NERVOUS AND SHE SLIPPED UNDER MY GRIP. SHE FELL AND WAS KNOCKED UNCONSCIOUS IN FRONT OF HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE. FML

#4543711
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48041) - you deserved it (18001)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:50am - love - by slipperyhands (man) - United States (California)



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