Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, my dad let me borrow his phone while I wait for mine to get back from the shop. I guess he forgot to pass the news along, because within 4 hours I'd received a picture of my mom's tits. FML

#21518424
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21848) - you deserved it (1820)

On 01/23/2016 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend read an FML by some guy about fight he had with his nutjob of a girlfriend. It was so bizarrely similar to a fight we had recently that she accused me of not having any balls and bitching about her to strangers. It wasn't even my story. FML

#21518234
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22709) - you deserved it (1762)

On 01/22/2016 at 3:55pm - love - by believe me now?? (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML

#21518195
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15774) - you deserved it (5094)

On 01/22/2016 at 2:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the company I work for lost 3-weeks worth of time sheets, so we have to fill them all out again. I don't remember what I did yesterday, let alone three weeks ago. That's why I religiously fill out the time sheets in the first place. FML

#21518159
39 comments

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

#21518118
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21121) - you deserved it (3139)

On 01/22/2016 at 7:50am - misc - by whattheactualfuck (man) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, a customer filed a complaint against me because my coworker took too long to do a price check. I hate my job. FML

#21517333
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19450) - you deserved it (1211)

On 01/20/2016 at 10:32am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

#21517322
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19584) - you deserved it (3167)

On 01/20/2016 at 9:27am - kids - by lambeaster (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML

#21517225
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18778) - you deserved it (1621)

On 01/20/2016 at 12:42am - misc - by Sittinginthecorner (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, a girl in my class introduced herself to me for the fourth time this semester. Am I really that invisible? FML

#21517019
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20956) - you deserved it (1705)

On 01/19/2016 at 3:07pm - misc - by Mr_Yato (man) - United States

Today, my roommate thought it was a good idea to set my beard on fire to wake me up. FML

#21516693
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19743) - you deserved it (1456)

On 01/18/2016 at 6:42pm - misc - by meh beard (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up from an amazing dream I was having about my girlfriend. We were laughing and holding hands, the kind of dream I wanted to stay asleep for. When I finally got up, I was excited to tell her about the dream but then I remembered. We broke up a week ago. FML

#21516669
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22319) - you deserved it (1540)

On 01/18/2016 at 5:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I stopped a guy from running under a moving London bus. No-one else saw what happened. How did the guy thank me? He wanted to fight me because I made him miss the bus I just saved him from. FML

#21516653
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17062) - you deserved it (1267)

On 01/18/2016 at 4:13pm - misc - by ukrukus (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while entering in my college building, I noticed that my right shoelace was untied and I tied it. I didn't realize that just in front of me was a metal beam until I hit my head hard on it and a loud, reverberating sound was produced. Many people saw what happened. FML

#21516540
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18080) - you deserved it (2603)

On 01/18/2016 at 9:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Benguet)



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