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FMLs submitted from United States

Today, I found my daughter's brand new ipod touch. At the bottom of the washing machine. FML

#7147521
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30783) - you deserved it (5932)

On 01/04/2010 at 4:07pm - kids - by payne (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend was holding my hair back while I threw up. The smell then reached him and caused him to throw up in my hair. FML

#7147061
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33128) - you deserved it (6407)

On 01/04/2010 at 3:16pm - misc - by kady (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that shutting off the heat in the rental property my parents owned was a bad idea. The water froze and the pipes burst, causing the whole kitchen ceiling to fall down. The water ruined the wood floors and the appliances. I turned off the heat to save money. FML

#7146444
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12215) - you deserved it (35089)

On 01/04/2010 at 2:20pm - money - by WorkSexMonkey (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while using the bathroom on an airplane, someone walked in on me wiping my butt. That person just so happened to be the stranger I was sitting next to. It was an 8 hour flight. FML

#7145421
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31336) - you deserved it (7908)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:40pm - misc - by GeorgiaBOYY (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. We decided to have sex in her basement. All awesome, until her mom walked down and wanted to watch a movie with us. I had to watch it naked under a blanket. FML

#7144399
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21474) - you deserved it (7451)

On 01/04/2010 at 10:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

#7143279
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40666) - you deserved it (3039)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:34am - health - by Soresack (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I realized that getting an awesome new phone with all the new bells and whistles doesn't mean that people will now actually want to talk to me. FML

#7139398
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12086) - you deserved it (25940)

On 01/04/2010 at 2:01am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was rejected for an internship due to 'lack of experience.' I have both an MA and a BA from a highly prestigious school and years of work experience. My would-be superior: a 24 year old without a graduate degree and only one year of work experience. She wore jeans to the interview. FML

#7137648
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31403) - you deserved it (3449)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:29am - work - by screwed (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to realize that the guy who took my virginity last night also took my flat screen TV. FML

#7135131
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27842) - you deserved it (9507)

On 01/03/2010 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by december2009 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I put cucumber slices on my eyes to help me relax. I found this very calming till I woke up to ants trying to eat my eyes out. FML

#7130565
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28815) - you deserved it (6287)

On 01/03/2010 at 6:59pm - misc - by jumpy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight about a clogged toilet. He was yelling about not having enough money to buy a better plunger and so I stormed out to buy one myself. While pulling his truck into traffic, a car hit me causing $1000 in damage. FML

#7127845
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24738) - you deserved it (9169)

On 01/03/2010 at 3:21pm - money - by brokeandsad (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was making myself lunch. I love cooking, and often, I pretend I'm on the Food Network. I started to slice some tomatoes rapidly, which, turns out, was a big mistake; I sliced my thumb open. FML

#7125178
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10431) - you deserved it (34005)

On 01/03/2010 at 12:11pm - misc - by PWI_addict (woman) - United States (New York)



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