FMLs submitted from United Kingdom

Today, the man I have been in a long-distance relationship with for 2 years told me he has been cheating on me for 6 months, and that he's leaving me for her. I'm due to fly out to see him next week on a non-refundable ticket. He insists that, "we can still hang out, just not have sex". FML

by Sadginger / 12/21/2015 at 6:45pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Intimacy

Today, four days before Christmas, I discovered a rash on my daughter's shoulder. The doctor took one look and said, "It's chicken pox. Merry Christmas." FML

by BadLuck / 12/21/2015 at 6:45am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Kids

Today, my perfectly healthy grandmother came to stay for Christmas. First, she persuaded my family to give her my bedroom. That would have been fine, until she demanded she should also have a bucket to piss in under my bed too. FML

by chamberpottime / 12/16/2015 at 3:58am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Health

Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML

by sorethumb / 12/15/2015 at 6:39pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Health

Today, I got a concussion at work. Our resident schizophrenic decided to test how gravity worked by dropping a torch over the bannister directly onto my head. I'm still seeing stars. FML

by msizziec / 12/14/2015 at 6:09pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out my credit card was maxed out to the penny, all thanks to purchases made on an online wine store. Apparently my mother was thirsty enough to steal from her own son. FML

by KamiAzaaaaaa / 12/11/2015 at 11:34am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Money

Today, I've become so accustomed to finding my sister drunk or otherwise passed out in the same spot in the living room that every time I go in there, I instinctively lift my feet higher as though to step over her, even when she's not there. FML

by anonymous / 12/09/2015 at 9:59pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, my ex, for whom I still have feelings, introduced me to his new girlfriend. To make things "less awkward," he invited a mutual friend of ours. However, the last time I'd seen this friend, it was a week after my ex and I had broke up, and we hooked up. Awkward doesn't cover it. FML

by neverleavingthehouseagain / 12/08/2015 at 6:08pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Love

Today, I confronted my friend about the £260 he owes me. He got offended and said, "Friends don't have to pay back." He called me selfish and walked off. FML

by *sigh* / 12/08/2015 at 5:56pm / United Kingdom / Money

Today, after years of loneliness, I met the most amazing girl on Omegle. We spoke for ages and really clicked. But before either of us could exchange numbers, I lost my internet connection and her along with it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2015 at 2:00pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I punched a drunk woman who kept trying to force herself onto my husband. She turned out to be an off-duty cop. FML

by BUSTED. / 12/01/2015 at 2:02pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I felt like Cinderella. No, I didn't lose a shoe in public. Nor did I dance with Prince Charming. But I did get a visit from tiny wild mice in my home. FML

by ModernCindy / 11/30/2015 at 11:07am / United Kingdom (Blackpool) / Animals

Today, I won a meal for two in a raffle. I had no one to go with. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2015 at 4:35pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Miscellaneous