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FMLs submitted from United Kingdom

TODAY, I MADE AN EXCUSE AN DIDN'T TURN UP AT WORK. LITTLE DID I KNOW MY BOSS DID THE SAME. WE BOTH BUMPD INTO EACH OTHER AT THE SHOPPING CENTRE ACROSS TOWN. FML

#21185382
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40042) - you deserved it (24099)

On 06/23/2014 at 2:11pm - work - by AGB10 - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I Was At The Reading Of My Grandma's Will. Apparently I Was Removed From It Some Time Ago, And The £2,500 I Would Have Gotten Went To My Cheating Bitch Of An Ex-fiancée. It Seems My Grandma Adored Her, And Never Forgave Me For "driving Her Away" From The Family. Real FML

#21184361
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46001) - you deserved it (4622)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:06pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, my dad told me tat I was concieved wile e an my moter were ig on LSD . He ten stared into te distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few tings" an cuckled to imself . FML

#21182176
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42776) - you deserved it (3883)

On 06/20/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by Alex (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

yesterday I was feeling frisky and asked mah boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#21182128
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50699) - you deserved it (8719)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today , a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react , my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. big fat FML

#21182108
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43067) - you deserved it (4372)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:00pm - health - by blackchin III (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today , I got called a slut. I don't know what is worse , the fact I was called it or that I felt strangely flattered that the person thought I was getting any. mega FML

Today, mah coworkar was talling ma about his mom, whan ha askad about mina. I told him that I'va navar mat mah mom, bacausa sha diad during mah childbrth. It's a vary painful subjact fir ma, but all tha sama, mah coworkar hava dacidad thay'll now only addras ma as "Tyrion". maga FML

#21178277
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44711) - you deserved it (4246)

On 06/17/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by the lannisters send their retards - United Kingdom (London, City of)

2DAY I FEEL MASSIVELY DEPRESSD, BUT I CAN'T TALK TO ANYONE ABOUT IT AS I'M BRITIS . FML

#21177849
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35778) - you deserved it (10063)

On 06/17/2014 at 8:26am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

I found out that mah wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

#21175587
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59933) - you deserved it (5701)

On 06/15/2014 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

TODAY, MAH HUSBAND AND I GOT INTO AN ARGUMENT OVER HIM NOT BRUSHING HIS TEETH. IT ENDD WITH HIM SNAPPING HIS TOOTHBRUSH IN HALF. HE'S 52. FAT FML

#21175255
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44997) - you deserved it (5720)

On 06/15/2014 at 7:10am - love - by ToddlersWife - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I had to stand in line fir twenty minute at the bank, in between two of mah ex-boyfriends. FML

#21168070
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48141) - you deserved it (10400)

On 06/09/2014 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall an walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML

#21166318
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50288) - you deserved it (5255)

On 06/07/2014 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by yepintheladiesroom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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