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FMLs submitted from Singapore

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

#20148752
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18987) - you deserved it (1755)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today, I decided to clean my face of unwanted visitors, and spent my shower popping the pimples on my cheeks. Twenty minutes later, I remembered that I was showering ahead of a date with my girlfriend. My cheeks now look like the crater-filled surface of Mars. FML

#20066193
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14885) - you deserved it (9965)

On 09/10/2012 at 12:19pm - health - by greeple - Singapore

Today, at my job at the mall, our music malfunctioned and now will only play the same three songs over and over again. Our manager won't let us turn it off because "the customers won't notice". FML

#20031862
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17452) - you deserved it (1201)

On 08/20/2012 at 12:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, after a spate of bad ones, I was in another job interview trying my hardest to give a good impression. After answering a few questions, I realized to my horror that while I was talking I was swiveling my chair from left to right like a nervous child. FML

#19748854
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14449) - you deserved it (3486)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:17am - work - by Swivel - Singapore

Today, I went on a second date with a guy I really liked, and we started chatting over dinner. That's when he told me about his paranoia, and how he's unsure if I'm out to get him or not. FML

#19747527
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18262) - you deserved it (1805)

On 06/07/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, a girl started talking to me at the bus stop. After it descended into an awkward silence, I jumped on my bus to avoid further conversation. She got on the same bus. And got off at the same stop. I swear the whole bus could feel the tension. FML

#19714803
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18400) - you deserved it (3815)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:24am - love - by Silent (man) - Singapore

Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML

#19611512
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17724) - you deserved it (1647)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore

Today, since I was grounded, I tried to sneak out of my room to attend a party by climbing out the second-storey window and down the tree. I was unharmed, but I probably should have checked to see if my dad was in the garden before climbing down. FML

#19312594
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6073) - you deserved it (41340)

On 03/20/2012 at 5:47am - misc - by treehugger - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend revealed to me that she has primeisodophobia. What is primeisodophobia, you may ask? Well, it's the fear of losing your virginity. FML

#19207829
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25482) - you deserved it (3465)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:23am - intimacy - by virginkiller (man) - Singapore

Today, it was my first day at work as a waitress. The day ended with me owing my employers money, after I accidentally smashed an expensive bottle of wine on the floor. FML

#18493927
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20358) - you deserved it (4187)

On 12/12/2011 at 12:08pm - work - by isuckasawaitress (woman) - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I ever cheated on him, he'll chop my body up and dispose of all the parts, but keep my boobies, because he likes them. FML

#18334603
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43439) - you deserved it (6837)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:01am - intimacy - by Faithful - Singapore

Today, my husband's car was stolen from our driveway while he was out jogging. We'd recently had a huge fight, and he accused me of having done this to get revenge. I was at work all day, but it seems this doesn't make any difference to his dumb, paranoid ass. FML

#18120485
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24655) - you deserved it (5583)

On 10/31/2011 at 12:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17827987
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33781) - you deserved it (2351)

On 09/25/2011 at 6:26am - love - by Anonymous - Singapore



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