FMLs submitted from Kenya

Today, I got a text from a call girl. She asked me to delete her number because I am too demanding. FML

by titkip / 04/01/2016 at 8:30pm / Kenya (Nairobi Area) / Intimacy

Today, being jobless and all, I tried calling my dad for a job after my many years of pride. He invited me to an interview to compete against 10 people, probably more qualified than I am. FML

by thesixth / 03/02/2016 at 1:53pm / Kenya / Work

Today, I got fired for being late. Apparently you're supposed to be on time after your boss specifically tells you that the office will open an hour late. FML

by thesixth / 03/01/2016 at 2:07pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous

Today, my driving instructor failed me on my test, because I forgot to turn the air conditioning off after parking. FML

by WOW / 07/13/2013 at 4:40pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous

Today, I've been living in Kenya in a nasty apartment for so long that when I looked down into my drink and saw a dead fly, I just picked it out and continued drinking. FML

by kenyaliving / 02/13/2013 at 5:04pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous

Today, the office coffee machine was relocated next to my desk. My co-worker insists on making several cups of the stuff per day, but instead of drinking it, he stands next to me, audibly swishes it through his teeth, gargles, and drools it back into the cup. I retch every single time. FML

by UuuuUUUUhhgghghghGHh / 02/09/2013 at 12:21pm / Kenya / Miscellaneous

Today, after a root canal, I went to the pharmacy for some pain killers. The cute girl behind the counter asked what I needed. When I opened my mouth to tell her, a wave of drool hurtled out and splattered on the counter. FML

by maninpain / 10/10/2011 at 3:44pm / Kenya / Love