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FMLs submitted from Ireland

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

#21407745
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30131) - you deserved it (5383)

On 05/10/2015 at 11:35am - intimacy - by YouDontSay (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I tried to write a bad review for the fast-food place at which I work part-time. My username made me anonymous, but I forgot to change my profile picture. Now my manager and coworkers won't even speak to me. FML

#21405584
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10719) - you deserved it (39569)

On 05/06/2015 at 10:34am - work - by Freelman - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I failed a major exam. It wasn't because I didn't prepare for it, though. I failed because somebody sneezed during it and I said "bless you." Apparently, that's classed as cheating. FML

Today, I was staying at my boyfriend's house while he was at work, and put on his pants to make some tea. As I took my hot tea and laptop upstairs, the pants slowly started to fall down. I had to keep climbing with my pants around my knees, and shuffle awkwardly past my boyfriend's father. FML

#21399154
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25029) - you deserved it (7699)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:38pm - misc - by Bullet4MyChemaMo - Ireland (Cork)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML

#21399079
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36964) - you deserved it (2442)

On 04/24/2015 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Laois)

Today, my 13-year-old sister told me that she wants to get pregnant soon to stop her periods for a while. I can't believe we're related. FML

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

#21382327
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28494) - you deserved it (3033)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by njh - Ireland

Today, while studying for a big test at the library, some idiots started playing hide-and-seek. After putting up with their snorting and giggling for nearly an hour, I finally lost my shit and told them to knock it off. I then got kicked out for causing a disturbance. FML

#21380708
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27815) - you deserved it (3537)

On 03/24/2015 at 12:51pm - misc - by faaail - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (9276)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, I experienced the horror of walking in on my best friend fondling his tits. Yes, "his". FML

#21351065
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27643) - you deserved it (2936)

On 02/06/2015 at 6:00pm - misc - by barf (woman) - Ireland

Today, I had a job interview at a café. The interviewer asked me my availability and I told her that I was fully flexible. She laughed and said, "Really? That's tragic." FML

#21345516
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25630) - you deserved it (2258)

On 01/28/2015 at 8:09am - work - by tipmeover (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

#21339526
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26920) - you deserved it (18733)

On 01/18/2015 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, I went to a club to celebrate New Year's Eve. A cute guy came up to me at the bar and asked my name. I thought my 8 year long dry spell was finally about to end. I smiled and said "Chrissy!" He said "That's a whore's name!" and wandered back off into the crowd. FML

#21327860
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31669) - you deserved it (2989)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:39pm - love - by cakestar9 (woman) - Ireland (Clare)



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