FMLs submitted from India

Today, after a lifetime of being single, my parents finally found me a nice, intelligent, pretty girl. I was really excited, until she backed out on me when she found out our star signs don't match. FML

by mrtoolate / 06/19/2016 at 4:58am / India (Maharashtra) / Love

Today, a few weeks after moving back to my home country, I found out my diploma isn't recognized here. The only training provider I can find that can upgrade it to something valid wants another 2 years of my life, 500 hours of work experience and $16,000. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2016 at 12:21pm / India (Maharashtra) / Miscellaneous

Today, while trying to get my boss to reconsider laying off much of my department, I accidentally convinced him to lay me off too. FML

by Anonymous / 04/21/2016 at 12:55am / India (Delhi) / Work

Today, a short guy asked me how the world looked "up there", as I'm really tall. I decided to lift him up so he could see for himself. I failed both times I tried, to the great amusement of everyone watching. FML

by SK8WITME / 02/12/2016 at 1:22pm / India / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my son's new habit. Sticking his finger up his ass, farting on it, and smelling it. Apparently, the scent is the purest then. FML

by notsoproudfather / 02/01/2016 at 10:54am / India (Maharashtra) / Kids

Today, I threw a punch at my sensei like he told me to, except he failed to block it like he assured me he would. Now I'm banned from his classes and I'm pretty sure he's going to get the police involved. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2015 at 10:48am / India (Maharashtra) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend's mother is more into me than she is. FML

by SadIndianLife / 11/15/2015 at 4:00pm / India (Delhi) / Love

Today, I tried to make a move on the cute guy who sits opposite me at work. In theory, I was going to start a game of footsie with him. In practice, I screwed up and managed to yank his computer's power cable out. He lost his unsaved work. FML

by Namaslayed / 10/16/2015 at 2:04pm / India (Maharashtra) / Work

Today, I've been calling my girlfriend by her nickname for so long, I had to reactivate my Facebook account to find her real name. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 9:56am / India (Tamil Nadu) / Miscellaneous

Today, is my five year anniversary. My boyfriend said he was gonna get me something shiny this year. I thought he was gonna propose. He got me a set of sparkle glue. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2015 at 3:45am / India (West Bengal) / Love

Today, my husband wanted to use bacon grease as lube. FML

by fuck no / 08/22/2015 at 6:18am / India (Kerala) / Intimacy

Today, I was trying to work out, and couldn't even complete an exercise regime meant for 50-year-olds. I'm 24. FML

by Anonymous / 07/21/2015 at 1:50pm / India (Karnataka) / Health

Today, I stayed over at my boyfriend's house for the first time. He soon found out about my sleep-talking habit. I started ranting about "electron shaming" and I apparently passionately support their "sub-atomic lifestyle". Yes, he managed to get it on video. FML

by wantmeasandwich / 07/10/2015 at 12:57pm / India (Maharashtra) / Miscellaneous