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FMLs submitted from France

Today, my mum prepared my bag for football practice. In the changing room I found one of her thongs. FML

#376
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24935) - you deserved it (3766)

On 11/23/2008 at 5:59am - misc - by rob - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst chatting with my mum on MSN, she unintentionally sent me an animated emoticon of a penis jerking off repeatedly. I don't even want to know the type of conversation she was having. FML

#375
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37058) - you deserved it (2372)

On 11/23/2008 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Dina - Sent from mobile version

Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML

#374
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12610) - you deserved it (27135)

On 11/23/2008 at 3:22am - misc - by lectro - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst doing it with my girlfriend she goes :"are you done any time soon?" FML

#367
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34183) - you deserved it (6539)

On 11/22/2008 at 7:24am - intimacy - by KaRaSu - Sent from mobile version

Today, after a tremendously hot night with a guy I met the night before, I ask him his phone number. To which he replied: "What for?" FML

#363
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34395) - you deserved it (9571)

On 11/22/2008 at 3:17am - intimacy - by izoliv - Sent from mobile version

Today, my electric razor fell flat right after I had finished with my first cheek. And of course I don't have a manual one. FML

#362
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22774) - you deserved it (5310)

On 11/22/2008 at 2:02am - misc - by Goatkvlt - Sent from mobile version

Today, I should have given my first concert in front of a crowded audience. As we were about to go on stage my band decided to roll a joint outside. The cops just happened to pass by and now I'm on my own. FML

#360
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27089) - you deserved it (4386)

On 11/21/2008 at 11:42pm - work - by christous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend came home with new condoms: Manix Endurance containing a numbing gel designed to help me "last longer". FML

#359
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35602) - you deserved it (10105)

On 11/21/2008 at 11:03pm - intimacy - by CoCo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to rent a DVD with my 85-year-old grandpa. I was walking around and then realized I was alone. I looked for him for quite a while until I finally found him open-mouthed in the porn section. FML

#356
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28311) - you deserved it (2515)

On 11/21/2008 at 7:53am - misc - by Kourou - Sent from mobile version

Today, after a year together, my boyfriend admitted to me that in bed I had as much an effect on him as a crossword puzzle. FML

#354
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27554) - you deserved it (3890)

On 11/21/2008 at 5:06am - love - by Mary - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 14-year-old little sister asked me how I felt when I had my first sexual intercourse. I told her it was personal and was none of her business. She then looked at me and said "I thought it was nice". I'm 19 and I'm still a virgin. FML

#353
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50162) - you deserved it (5973)

On 11/21/2008 at 2:23am - intimacy - by KoNi - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was finally able to get to know a girl at university who I'd been eyeing up for months. We had a nice conversation. We discovered that we live in the same area, and so we talked about that. I told her that the little restaurant under my house was really disgusting. Her parents own it. FML

#352
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29401) - you deserved it (9766)

On 11/21/2008 at 12:40am - misc - by lpilou - Sent from mobile version

Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I hear him in the hall I shout out "come on, don't be shy, bring that cock in here right now!". A voice replies: "he's gone out to get some bread". It was my mother-in-law. FML

#351
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44318) - you deserved it (16579)

On 11/20/2008 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Tinker-Bell - Sent from mobile version



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