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FMLs submitted from Denmark

Today, my wife figured that a good foreplay move would be to rub MY underwear in MY face. FML

#15675353
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33618) - you deserved it (9109)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:19am - intimacy - by 1337fade (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

#15370334
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42587) - you deserved it (9357)

On 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm - misc - by Jonathan (man) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, my roommate complained about his penis being smelly and itchy. It's been a week. Yesterday he woke me up in the middle of the night, asking if I had some kind of Vaseline or moisturizer he could use for the itching. He still refuses to go to the doctor. FML

#14962241
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27537) - you deserved it (2357)

On 02/13/2011 at 7:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I spent most of the day doing a project for school. When I finished, I got a call from my project partner. She couldn't finish her part because her internet didn't work. When I finally finished everything, I went on Facebook. She was on Facebook too. FML

#14798107
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42108) - you deserved it (4201)

On 02/01/2011 at 3:26pm - misc - by peachmelba (woman) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML

#14785892
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29035) - you deserved it (3003)

On 01/31/2011 at 8:55am - misc - by Micawber - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML

#14533477
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8098) - you deserved it (36013)

On 01/10/2011 at 2:06pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, I had a snowball fight with a friend. In the midst of the game, I stole her hat and put it on my head, ignoring her pleas. Apparently, she was trying to say she had head lice. I can now verify that. FML

#14397840
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9002) - you deserved it (38796)

On 12/30/2010 at 4:37pm - health - by infected - Denmark

Today, I helped two people find the central station on my way home. As a thank you, they mugged me and stole my wallet and iPod Touch. FML

#13935751
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28163) - you deserved it (3699)

On 11/22/2010 at 10:25am - misc - by americanized (man) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I found out that people can get ringworm from cats. I found out because I have ringworm. I don't have a cat. Then I remembered I helped a friend move about two weeks ago, and spent the night sharing a bed with her cat. That's the last time I ever help her move. FML

#13861463
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22502) - you deserved it (3656)

On 11/16/2010 at 2:13am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, the weather man announced that today's forecast will include heavy rain and hail in my city. Normally, this wouldn't be a big deal. However, my house has no roof at the moment. FML

#13803743
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29698) - you deserved it (4108)

On 11/11/2010 at 4:40pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my dad borrowed my new iPad to amuse him while he was in the shower without my knowledge. The iPad is now completely ruined, and my dad is refusing to buy me a new one. He says, "How was I to know that it wasn't waterproof?" FML

#13158291
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41887) - you deserved it (3464)

On 09/22/2010 at 4:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, someone whistled, so I turned around. The guy behind me then said: "Did you seriously think that it was meant for you?" FML

#13017861
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34527) - you deserved it (4479)

On 09/12/2010 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, we had guests coming over. My dad wanted me to make some bacon, but I refused because I'm a vegetarian, and don't like to touch meat. His response? 'Good joke honey, now make the bacon.' FML

#11238681
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31016) - you deserved it (16826)

On 06/16/2010 at 10:42am - health - by Joy (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)



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