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FMLs submitted from Denmark

Today, it's my birthday. The present I received from my best friend was the exact same necklace which I gave to her for her birthday two months ago. It had been unwrapped and re-wrapped in the same paper. FML

#17063593
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31771) - you deserved it (3508)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by Vic (woman) - Denmark

Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML

#16675127
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30053) - you deserved it (2706)

On 06/15/2011 at 9:37am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I woke up, rolled over, and kissed the boy who was peacefully sleeping next to me, cheerfully saying, "Good morning, baby!" That boy is my dog. FML

#16284228
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12754) - you deserved it (29482)

On 05/21/2011 at 5:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark

Today, my mother said she called our internet provider, and told them to cancel it. In rage, I left for a friends house for a couple of hours. When I got home, she told me she was joking, and wanted me out of the house so she could eat all the ice-cream. FML

#16041715
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12483) - you deserved it (25630)

On 05/04/2011 at 5:11am - misc - by Derps (man) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, my wife figured that a good foreplay move would be to rub MY underwear in MY face. FML

#15675353
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31488) - you deserved it (8834)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:19am - intimacy - by 1337fade (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

#15370334
369 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39589) - you deserved it (8929)

On 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm - misc - by Jonathan (man) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, my roommate complained about his penis being smelly and itchy. It's been a week. Yesterday he woke me up in the middle of the night, asking if I had some kind of Vaseline or moisturizer he could use for the itching. He still refuses to go to the doctor. FML

#14962241
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26125) - you deserved it (2255)

On 02/13/2011 at 7:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I spent most of the day doing a project for school. When I finished, I got a call from my project partner. She couldn't finish her part because her internet didn't work. When I finally finished everything, I went on Facebook. She was on Facebook too. FML

#14798107
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40475) - you deserved it (4069)

On 02/01/2011 at 3:26pm - misc - by peachmelba (woman) - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML

#14785892
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24804) - you deserved it (2695)

On 01/31/2011 at 8:55am - misc - by Micawber - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML

#14533477
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6007) - you deserved it (26585)

On 01/10/2011 at 2:06pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Midtjyllen)

Today, I had a snowball fight with a friend. In the midst of the game, I stole her hat and put it on my head, ignoring her pleas. Apparently, she was trying to say she had head lice. I can now verify that. FML

#14397840
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7075) - you deserved it (32593)

On 12/30/2010 at 4:37pm - health - by infected - Denmark

Today, I helped two people find the central station on my way home. As a thank you, they mugged me and stole my wallet and iPod Touch. FML

#13935751
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26301) - you deserved it (3540)

On 11/22/2010 at 10:25am - misc - by americanized (man) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I found out that people can get ringworm from cats. I found out because I have ringworm. I don't have a cat. Then I remembered I helped a friend move about two weeks ago, and spent the night sharing a bed with her cat. That's the last time I ever help her move. FML

#13861463
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19814) - you deserved it (3352)

On 11/16/2010 at 2:13am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)



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