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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I did such a bad job explaining the recent change from daylight savings time, that my 5-year-old son is now convinced that we're time travellers. FML

#21489205
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20702) - you deserved it (4419)

On 11/06/2015 at 12:02pm - kids - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend called. He said he would sing me a song, like I'd wanted for a long time. I was excited, but surprised at his song choice. He sang 'Locked Away' by R. City ft. Adam Levine. Turns out, he was calling me from jail. He thought this was romantic, and expected me to bail him out. FML

Today, my mother in law basically said I deserve my breast cancer, all because I declined to take part in one of her "March Against Cancer" events a while ago. I guess donating money to cancer research instead of going on a meaningless march really messed up my karma. FML

#21486368
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27107) - you deserved it (1637)

On 10/31/2015 at 1:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work on a construction site, my coworker dropped a small piece of metal from 4 stories, and it struck another worker. We quickly began to climb down to see if the person was OK, and the same coworker dropped a metal pole, and crushed my hand, two minutes after the first accident. FML

#21485887
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23628) - you deserved it (1352)

On 10/29/2015 at 4:51pm - work - by sparky83000 - Canada

Today, I was at work, stocking shelves. A customer got mad because I was in the way of her "shopping time" and knocked down all the work I had done. FML

#21485710
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22459) - you deserved it (1262)

On 10/29/2015 at 4:33am - work - by tired of my job - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I walked in on my best friend with his hand down my girlfriend's pants and her moaning for him to "keep going". She had the brass balls to claim she had a "tummy ache" and that he was just rubbing her stomach better. I may be a total dumbass, but I'm not THAT stupid. FML

#21483470
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35250) - you deserved it (2195)

On 10/23/2015 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, thanks to pregnancy hormones, I cried my eyes out for hours over the guy who dumped me 9 years ago. FML

#21483450
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22997) - you deserved it (2740)

On 10/23/2015 at 2:56pm - love - by shakira, when the walls fell (woman) - Canada

Today, I was called a ruthless bitch for not waking up early to search for my car keys, so my boyfriend could go get his pipe and get high before work. FML

#21482942
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22122) - you deserved it (5115)

On 10/22/2015 at 10:05am - love - by cantfallbackasleep - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my blind date tried to sell me a vacuum. I bought it. FML

Today, the father of my unborn child got laid off. Without a work visa, he may have to leave the country before this baby even arrives. FML

Today, I got into a minor argument with my fiancé. Deciding it wasn't worth fighting over, I shrugged and said, "Really, what are we even doing this for?" To which he replied, "Honestly, I don't know. I haven't loved you in years… Oh, you meant about the fight." And just like that, I'm now single. FML

#21479918
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31919) - you deserved it (2491)

On 10/14/2015 at 8:41am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom and dad went to court to negotiate child support for me and my brothers. During the meeting, my dad was asked, "Sir, are you saying that the only reason you want your sons to live with you full time is so you don't have to pay child support?" To which he responded, "Yes." FML

#21479731
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25479) - you deserved it (1446)

On 10/13/2015 at 9:21pm - misc - by vanillapudding6 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while I was in the shower, my 4 year old son wondered what would happen if he put 6 eggs in the microwave. FML

#21479171
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22754) - you deserved it (2890)

On 10/12/2015 at 5:35pm - kids - by why do eggs explode - Canada (Alberta)



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