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FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I was at my lifeguarding exam. Everything was going well until I went to 'save' someone and slipped and bellyflopped into the pool. I broke my toe, and the person I was supposed to save ended up saving me instead. FML

#21432224
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26246) - you deserved it (2622)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:09am - misc - by mytoehurts - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on a raccoon viciously tearing apart a giant bag of dog food, not five feet away from my sleeping dog. FML

#21431556
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23891) - you deserved it (1801)

On 06/25/2015 at 1:30am - animals - by wtfkasey - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML

#21430924
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32926) - you deserved it (1954)

On 06/23/2015 at 11:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I'm five and a half weeks pregnant. One of my coworkers told me that it sucks that I'll have to wait so long to show. I asked her what she meant; she replied, "It's always harder to tell when big girls are pregnant. Can't tell what's fat and what's baby." FML

#21428256
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28906) - you deserved it (4562)

On 06/18/2015 at 8:58pm - work - by pregnantfatty - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML

#21427542
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24200) - you deserved it (11971)

On 06/17/2015 at 11:41am - misc - by HURP (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad has apparently decided that it's too much of a bother to put clothes on when he gets out of bed. He's been walking around in his tighty-whiteys for hours now. FML

#21425446
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22528) - you deserved it (2266)

On 06/13/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by pantsareathing (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I arrived at the salon to get my hair done for prom. The lady at the front desk insisted I didn't have an appointment. After looking back on my recent calls, it turned out I called the wrong number and whatever asshole was on the other line played along. FML

#21424643
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28102) - you deserved it (3791)

On 06/11/2015 at 7:14pm - misc - by Badhairday - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were downtown when he pointed to a girl and said he wished I dressed more like she did. She was obviously a hooker. FML

#21424409
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23991) - you deserved it (2359)

On 06/11/2015 at 10:37am - love - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was told by my manager to make sure the supervisor on shift does his job. Last month I was told I couldn't be a supervisor. Apparently I can supervise someone who earns more than I do though. FML

#21424106
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23854) - you deserved it (1402)

On 06/10/2015 at 7:45pm - work - by cocoapuffs4life - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were hanging out when he suddenly said, "Do you know who I think is the most beautiful girl in the world?" I prepared myself for a cute compliment, until he showed me a picture of another girl. FML

#21423616
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27345) - you deserved it (2554)

On 06/09/2015 at 10:44pm - love - by storyofmylife - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, at my place of work in a fast-food restaurant, a customer called in and bitched at me that her warm food was weirdly cold. That is, after she drove 45 minutes from the restaurant to her house. FML

#21423053
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25146) - you deserved it (1588)

On 06/08/2015 at 9:47pm - work - by frustratedandunderpaid - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I found my boyfriend and his friends laughing hysterically and practically choking on popcorn. They were watching a video of me in a school play, trying to sing while sobbing because I'd just pissed my pants in front of 200 people. Thanks for giving him the video, mom. FML

#21422192
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30238) - you deserved it (2235)

On 06/07/2015 at 5:46am - misc - by .......... (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I learned that not only do wood ticks have a habit of dropping off of branches onto you as you walk under them, they also like to hang out in groups of five or six. FML

#21421750
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24403) - you deserved it (1940)

On 06/06/2015 at 12:19pm - animals - by seadrick (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)



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