FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I searched for free parking near my work for 30 minutes, trying to avoid paying $12 at a pay lot. I scored a spot, but 1 mile away from the office. I trekked through rain, cold, and got to work late. It was a long hard day, crawled back to my car, and had a $30 ticket on my windshield. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2009 at 1:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I received a surprise "absolute final notice" email for payment of an overdue fee from the university I withdrew from 6 months ago. Turns out, my old landlord has been hoarding their letters to me. As a result, my credit is now in the shitter and I had to pay an extra $120 in interest. FML

by Anonymous / 09/29/2009 at 10:11pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, I was chastised by the CEO in the middle of a management meeting for showing up late to work every day, despite being in my office before 9:00am every morning. It was my 5th day on the job and no one had bothered to tell me that the office opens at 8:00am, and not 9:00am. FML

by Anonymous / 09/29/2009 at 1:26am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I got fired from my job for not "interacting with customers." That's understandable. The thing is, my job didn't actually include any customer interaction. FML

by justfired / 09/28/2009 at 10:57pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Work

Today, was my wedding day and I had been preparing my speech for my husband for about 3 months. At the wedding, I poured my heart out to him. Did he do the same? My husband forgot about it and right before the wedding, took his from his first marriage and changed the name. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2009 at 10:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, was my first day as a bouncer. I was a bit late and didn't meet all the staff. Later that night, some fairly drunk guy was trying to force his way in, I told him we were at capacity and that he would have to wait. He kept trying and I ended up pushing him to the floor. He was the owner. FML

by Baboosh / 09/28/2009 at 12:11am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML

by NiHao / 09/27/2009 at 11:16pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, I got an email from my University informing me that I was invited to an exclusive dinner for 25 people. As I continued to read through the email, I discovered that I wasn't lucky or special, but that the dinner was for financially unstable students. They think I'm a charity case. FML

by bubblegummm13 / 09/27/2009 at 12:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2009 at 12:10am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cuddling on the couch with my girlfriend when I started to tickle her, she asked me to stop but I continued. She had a reaction, and kneed me in the happy sacks. FML

by civicman / 09/26/2009 at 10:19pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I wrote to the guy whom I am in love with how I feel about him. He was very calm and told me to give him some time to think it over. Later in the day, I found out he blocked my number and rejected me on facebook. But, the worse part is he then texted me saying "This is my reply". FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2009 at 7:02pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I went our school's football game against their rival team. Before the games started, I got my school's logo painted on my face. After nearly 5 hours of watching the game, I went home to wash the paint off my face, only to find the logo had been sunburned onto my face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2009 at 6:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got flowers at work. I was excited until I saw they were from my good friend saying, "Sorry for sleeping with your boyfriend!" FML

by Tally / 09/24/2009 at 12:16pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love