Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Canada

Today, I arrived at work to find an email from the manager whom I had bought concert tickets from the night before. He said he had actually sold those tickets to someone else. He still expects to be paid. FML

#8692922
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26073) - you deserved it (2280)

On 02/27/2010 at 3:45pm - work - by mcfaily - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that I spent a year helping my dad get back into shape, not for his own good health which was what I thought, but so that he could cheat on my mom with 5 other women. FML

#8670993
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32957) - you deserved it (2245)

On 02/26/2010 at 7:39pm - misc - by 0867142 - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while waiting to do a presentation in class I felt someone flick my back, but when I turned around no one was there. It wasn't until I got up in front of the whole class that I felt my bra slowly sliding down my body. Turns out that the "flick" I felt was actually my bra clasp busting open. FML

#8632694
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28693) - you deserved it (3211)

On 02/25/2010 at 2:05am - misc - by thewordsicantsay (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I spilled a glass of iced tea all over my desk. It trickled down the wall and fried an extension cord. FML

#8615940
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19143) - you deserved it (9006)

On 02/24/2010 at 2:43pm - misc - by dumbbass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

#8612745
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38783) - you deserved it (5524)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a seizure at work. My boss walked by and saw me, but didn't help or do anything because he thought I was "picking something up off the floor." FML

#8607847
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33774) - you deserved it (1932)

On 02/24/2010 at 1:29am - work - by argh (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boss made me some tortellini for lunch. As I was happily eating it, he started to give me a massage, while talking to his friends in Greek. He told me that he said "She's my #1 cashier." Turns out, what he really said was "See, if you feed them well, they let you touch them." FML

#8576368
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30853) - you deserved it (5811)

On 02/23/2010 at 12:17am - work - by meaganlea (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML

#8553099
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28818) - you deserved it (2787)

On 02/22/2010 at 1:11pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went skiing. Trying to show off to some inexperienced skiers, I flew past them at my top speed, a bracket snapped off my boot and I slid on my face for about 30 metres. FML

#8508631
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8070) - you deserved it (35263)

On 02/21/2010 at 5:01am - love - by hoser - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML

#8506785
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24357) - you deserved it (3698)

On 02/21/2010 at 3:19am - intimacy - by horny21 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I learned the hard way that my foundation shows up under a black light. At a black light party. No one told me until afterwards. Everyone took pictures. FML

#8492061
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (4794)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:52pm - misc - by makeuuuuup (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. While we were fooling around, she started squeezing my cheeks and told me I remind her of her son. FML

#8434762
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23673) - you deserved it (3421)

On 02/19/2010 at 2:41am - intimacy - by Brett meek - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML

#8406793
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18990) - you deserved it (4969)

On 02/18/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by goldie09 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: