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FMLs submitted from Belgium

Today, I went into hospital for knee surgery. When I awoke, I was surprised to find a bandage wrapped around my throbbing head. The nurse explained that a student observer had fainted in the operating room and his head had smashed against mine on the way down. FML

#17027356
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36993) - you deserved it (2184) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2011 at 11:46am - health - by Anonymous - Belgium (Liege)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to declare my love to the girl I have a crush on. I guess I shouldn't have gone and kissed her without warning, because now my face is covered with slap marks, and I had to explain myself at the police station for sexual harassement. FML

#16531117
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11758) - you deserved it (47316)

On 06/06/2011 at 2:55pm - love - by Someguy (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I was walking home when a stranger came up to me and told me to give him a good reason why he shouldn't punch me in the face. I guess none were good enough. FML

#16370562
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34451) - you deserved it (3539)

On 05/27/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, my motorcycle was stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, the thief drove past me. Twice. FML

#16030983
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36649) - you deserved it (4009)

On 05/03/2011 at 10:23am - misc - by Diesel (man) - Belgium (Luxembourg)

Today, some kids stole all four wheels off my car. They were nice enough to leave a note and some money though, "for the bus". FML

#16019769
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27490) - you deserved it (2074)

On 05/02/2011 at 2:47pm - misc - by teinage - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I discovered my cat frequently licks my toothbrush. FML

#15525656
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28110) - you deserved it (5069)

On 03/28/2011 at 1:56am - animals - by upliftmofo - Belgium

Today, I decided to have dinner with three friends to forget about the painful break up with my boyfriend. The first friend announced that she and her boyfriend had just bought a house, the second one that he was no longer single, and the third one revealed that she was pregnant. FML

#15504031
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33278) - you deserved it (4313)

On 03/26/2011 at 9:19pm - love - by marie12 (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML

#14973308
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33315) - you deserved it (4002)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57018) - you deserved it (5879) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I woke up to my kids shaking me, saying, "Get up, Santa was here!" I got up to find my TV, computer and MacBook Air all gone. FML

#14191427
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32303) - you deserved it (2749)

On 12/13/2010 at 2:32pm - kids - by crazycora (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I wanted to try my mom's new lipstick. I opened it, baffled, examined it carefully. That's when it started to vibrate. Obviously, that wasn't a lipstick. FML

#13961412
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23756) - you deserved it (9250)

On 11/24/2010 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, I was in the airport after saying goodbye to my boyfriend who left for three months. Walking back to my car, I saw a young couple kissing passionately. If that wasn't bad enough, the guy then picked his girlfriend up, spun her round in the air and her foot kicked me square in the jaw. FML

#12852491
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32264) - you deserved it (3390)

On 09/01/2010 at 9:50am - love - by ouch (woman) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, my grandfather died. The last thing he said to me was "You smell awful." I work in a fish store. FML

#11377747
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38075) - you deserved it (4412)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:49am - misc - by Mangler (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)



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